April 19, 2024
Feel, Heal, and Reveal - A Journey to Emotional Independence
How do we thrive with emotional independence and peace in our lives.
I am please to have PJ Victor on the show. PJ has experienced the worst things we can imagine in her life, yet she has learned to thrive through processes she shares in her book,...
How do we thrive with emotional independence and peace in our lives.
I am please to have PJ Victor on the show. PJ has experienced the worst things we can imagine in her life, yet she has learned to thrive through processes she shares in her book, “Feel, Heal, and Reveal”. She shares her experiences and also her solutions.
You can learn more at https://linktr.ee/jenahsjourney.
Please join us.
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At the end of the day,
it's not about what you have or even
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what you've accomplished. It's about what
you've done with those accomplishments. It's about
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who you've lifted up, who you've
made better. It's about what you've given
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back. Denzel Washington, Welcome to
inspire Vision. Our sole purpose is to
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elevate the lives of others and to
inspire you to do the same. Excellent,
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Thank you so much for having me
located. So I am currently in
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Palma Sola, Florida on the Gulf
Coast. Oh. It is a beautiful
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sunny day. History do what you
what you are doing? Press and so
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brought you to the point writing a
book and doing then administration and those kind
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of things. So I was a
child with not a typical childhood as far
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as we look at America today.
I was raised in the seventies by a
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mother who unfortunately, at that time, when parents got divorced, they just
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gave children to the mothers. They
didn't really take a look at what might
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have been in the best interest of
the child. So I was raised by
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a drug addict and an alcoholic who
was trading my body to drug dealers for
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drugs. So I was basically what
we now call sexually trafficked starting around the
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age of two. And it wasn't
until I was five years old and taken
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by a neighbor to a vacation Bible
school that I looked up and I saw
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a picture on the wall. And
I told the woman, as I was
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gluing toothpicks to the little milk carton
making my little church, said I know
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that man, and she said,
oh, yes, of course that's Jesus.
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Said, I don't know his name. I just know he's the man
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that sits in the corner and cries
when the bad men are hurting me.
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So I didn't have a typical raising, and I escaped into books. I
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read a lot of books to escape
what I was living, and my father
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did. My biological father finally got
custody of me when I was eleven and
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a half. And yes, I
did do therapy and we tried to create
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a normal childhood for me. But
I wouldn't call it normal because I started
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acting and singing and modeling and being
on stages and being in commercial and it
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was a lot of fun. But
I think I was just hiding and masking
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pain and so after being in some
not wonderful relationships, since I couldn't fix
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mommy obviously, I decided to do
a missionary dating expedition and date boys with
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drug and alcohol problems. So I
ended up in a yoga class at a
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shelter for abused women and children.
When I ended up there, and I
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vowed to give back by volunteering.
One day after I became a certified yoga
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teacher, and so I wanted to
volunteer to help others learn to have peace
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within themselves and use their own breath
for that. Because I know I've spoken
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to many people over the years.
I could have taken a similar route as
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my mother. I could have because
of the abuse I endured become a drug
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addict or prostitute. But instead I
found how to yoke my breath to Jesus
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and to God. And so then
I started to teach group and private yoga
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classes and then become a Christian yoga
therapist, and I then became a certified
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mindfulness meditation teacher. And all of
the coaching that I've been doing is based
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on self regulation principles, because honestly, when you've been abused, no matter
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what age you have, a hard
time finding your breath, recognizing that you
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can breathe, and you become into
this constant state of fight or flight.
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And I have found that yoga helps
me and meditation helps me as an important
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piece of self care for me.
And I didn't want to just keep it
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to me. I wanted to share
it, and honestly, rather than wallow
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in self pity, I wanted to
inspire others wrote a book. And well,
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it's funny because I wanted to write
a book. I was actually thinking
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about this recently. I had written
it, you know, goals and dreams.
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What's the difference when you write it
down right? And I wanted to
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publish a book by the time I
was thirty five. However, life was
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happening and different things in life kept
happening, so it never happened. And
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I am super excited because it all
like it all fell together. This My
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first book was published just two weeks
before I turned fifty one, and then,
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because I was writing two other books
at the same time, not sure
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how this should all be. A
week and a half ago my publisher put
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my second book, which is actually
a letter to my twenty one year old
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son, in print. So now
i have two books in less than four
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weeks, and I'm ecstatic because they
are similar but different. And I love
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the fact that I now have these
two different audiences that I can hopefully inspires.
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Right. I don't know what got
published. I can tell you that
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feel heal and Reveal is definitely the
journey that I have been on for essentially
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fifty one years of finding emotional independence. I have learned and I know that
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many people, whether it be because
of trauma or because of just where they
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found themselves in life, you can
physically remove yourself from an abusive situation or
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an unsafe situation, but you're not
emotionally immediately healed. It doesn't happen.
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There is a well, there's just
numerous things that your body has gone through
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if you've been in a trauma state
long enough. There's a beautiful book called
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The Body Keeps Score. And unfortunately, the way our bodies work, we
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end up in physical disase. And
so this book was it was a it
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was a passion project because I took
the he said she set out. There's
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nothing in there about the relationships I've
been in, and I'm not telling my
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specific story. I'm really giving a
guide to anyone, be it a teenager,
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a dad, a mom, grandma. It doesn't matter what stage of
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life you're in. If you realize
that you are emotionally still tied to something
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that you don't want to be,
there's this ebb and flow and there are
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steps forward and back that you can
take to help you find emotionally dependence and
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my journey. Okay, great,
great, And you know you you mentioned
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then you mentioned mindset, and you
know, I know a lot a lot
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of people and the interviews it's like, you know what, I can't be
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do yoga. I just don't.
Don't. I can't even even without yoga
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yoga. But but many many think
things physical, physical tightening thing. And
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now now I'm learning and even as
its kind of kind of meditation. When
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when you talk you talk about yoga
and you're talk talking about medication, are
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you talk same, separate, similar? I would say separate from, but
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similar. And I think it's up
to the individual. So for me,
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I believe that yoga is your breath. I mean that's the bare bones.
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Everyone can do yoga because we all
breathe. Okay, okay, if there's
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physical limitations to your body, you
can still do yoga. I taught chair
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yoga, and I've taught to people
individuals in wheelchairs. Because what the mind
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sees, the body believes. So
if I'm sitting in the chair and I'm
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lifting my arms and breathing, and
you are sitting in a chair or in
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a wheelchair, and even if your
arms cannot physically move, as long as
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you're taking that inhale and that exhale, you are putting your body into a
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beautiful state. And as you've changed
your state, you can change your mindset.
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And as you change your mindset,
you can literally change your life.
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Okay, so let's talk. Let's
talk why it is. So there's I
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really think that mindset is a part
of finding congruence or agreement between the conscious
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and the unconscious mind. There are
many things that we do, breathing our
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heart, pumping blood, knowing to
move away from a hot stove. There's
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all these things that you can involuntary
and voluntarily do. But your mindset is
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incredibly powerful for healing as well as
just for daily survival. But see,
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I want to take it a step
further. I don't want to just survive.
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I want to be a thriver.
So if I'm going to thrive.
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Then I have to make sure that
I am at my purpose. And if
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I'm going to be at my purpose, then I can't be someone who's wallowing
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in self pity. And therefore,
the best way I have found is you
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know, people always talk about how
many muscles does it take to smile versus
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frown. Well, your your your
mindset is essentially, in its own right,
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a muscle. And so by exercising
your mind and adjusting your mindset with
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the power of not just positive thinking, but yoga and meditation, you literally
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can change your own self and then
that ripple effect changes the world talked my
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mindset. People experience life from from
conconscious experience those and they don't that they
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are very experiencing is nearly earlier conscience
conscious experiencea cetera. And if correct correctly
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my mind a situation and those to
come up. That's that's that's the thing
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that is necessarily any part of my
life anymore. And you that affirm information
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and my opinion, yes, yes
you are. Because here's the thing.
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I think that a lot of times
in our current society, people take a
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look at sensitivity as a weakness,
so you might get lumped in if you're
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someone who exudes a positive mindset that
oh that's an EmPATH or all these different
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like labels that they want to put
on people. And then living beliefs come
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out of that. And if you
have limiting beliefs, then your mindset becomes
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limited. And so I really want
to encourage people and inspire people to understand
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that sensitivity is a source of power. It's not a weakness. And once
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you understand how you interact with the
world and the people in it, well,
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then you have this incredible privilege of
being able to cultivate environments and relationships
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that honor your sensitivity rather than demean
it. And so you create these healthy
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boundaries within yourself by giving yourself unbelievably
beautiful attention by just sitting in meditation or
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exercising within the forms of yoga,
and you become an individual that has the
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power to not just believe in yourself, but to allow others is to see
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this person is different. Maybe I
want to be like that too, Yeah,
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child, and all potentially effect effect
such a secretive way. Now you
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know, I know it by a
bile on Earth three and heaven. Can
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you can talk to talk about that
a little come on that could could have
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potential. I will say that because
of my own childhood, A top goal,
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a top priority was when I get
older, I'm going to be a
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better mom than my mom was.
Well, the bar wasn't set that high.
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I was frightened to become a mother. What if it's ingrained in me?
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People talk about generational trauma and all
these things like what if I am
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just automatically this horrible mom. And
my father has now he's been in heaven
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almost twenty years, but before my
I guess it's been almost sixteen years.
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But before my oldest son was born, he told me, he said,
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all you have to do is the
exact opposite of your mother and you'll do
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great. And I was like,
oh, that's good advice. And my
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first son was born, and unfortunately, because of the person I had chose
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to be with for the rest of
my life, it didn't work out that
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way. We weren't together for the
rest of our lives and we were actually
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separated before I well, at around
I was six months pregnant at the time.
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So my son came into the world
with just me and a little tiny
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support system, a little village of
those who love me and A few years
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later, I did find someone else
and we got married, and fortunately there
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was a miscarriage, and that was
very devastating to me. And there were
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things going on in life, and
I already had a young one, so
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you just pick up and you go. And I didn't really grieve at all,
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I'll be very honest. Then when
my second son was born, it
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was like, ah, the rainbow
child, and you move forward, and
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now you have two children, and
you're going and you're going. And then
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I suffered a second loss of a
child, and it was kind of the
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same situation. I did have a
little bit of advice from someone in a
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Christian world that told me to write
a letter to God and ask him to
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accept these two children and love on
them until I can get to heaven.
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Okay, I'll say that might have
been helpful, and I kept going in
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life. And then with my third
son, he was actually a twin.
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Because of the shooting in Las Vegas
in twenty seventeen and the challenge that I
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had there, I ended up with
a staff infection from the shooting and I
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was bedridden and I ended up losing
one of the twins. And you were,
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you were, you were, and
literally of experience experience shooting. Yes,
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the best we can figure, there
was a young girl who got shot
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right in front of me and her
two friends. The bullet went through her
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abdomen. Two friends picked her up
and they ran off, and it sounded
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like a beasting. It felt like
a beasting, but there was so much
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chaos. I wasn't aware that the
blood on my white shirt was my own,
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and that my ear had what seems
to be the conclusion that we've all
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drawn is that the bullet from her
body grazed the corner of my ear and
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it looked like cauliflower, like a
boxer's ear. By the time the lockdown
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was over and I was able to
get home, and then when I ended
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up in the er, they were
like, whoa, we got to clean
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this wound, and here's some antibiotics, and those were obviously too strong for
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my body with being pregnant. And
then it wasn't long after that that my
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body decided that one of the twins
was not going to stay in my body.
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But that wasn't the end, because
then it was like this, the
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blood mixture apparently was not good,
and I ended up with a staff infection
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and it just It took almost six
months, almost the whole rest of the
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pregnancy, for my body to truly
try to find itself in a state of
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healing. And it wasn't done because
after my youngest was born, it wasn't
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postpartum depression. It was like all
of this loss and all of this trauma
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I had ever experienced was just coming
into like a firestorm all at once.
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And that is when I learned that
I had developed an autoimmune disorder that had
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kind of blossomed from all of these
experiences. But it was just the shooting
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was the final straw that broke the
camel's back, I guess, and there
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was. It was at least I
would say, close to two years of
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emotionally not feeling proper, physically not
feeling proper, and going through numerous diagnoses
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and medical things and nobody could really
say what exactly was wrong with me.
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And at that time, I was
trying to finally finish my yoga certifications,
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so that because I thought, you
know, my mindset was if I help
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others, then it's going to help
me. And I did did start to
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teach, but I was still struggling
health wise, and I finally I got
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to a doctor who told me you're
not gonna make it. Your body is
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shutting down, your your oxygenation levels
and your this, and you'r that in
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terms I didn't really understand, because
pretty much by the time my son was
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four, she is saying to me, get your will in order, and
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I'm like, wait a minute,
I have three pole and I am trying
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to end a very toxic relationship and
I don't want to leave this earth yet
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I'm not done. I know there's
a purpose to my life. So that
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is, honestly, it's a gut
wrenching feeling. And it was a very
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powerful wake up moment to me that
the body really does keep scoring and that
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the longer I kept reacting instead of
responding to things in my life, there
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wasn't going to be much life left. And I had to find a way
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to replenish my inner strength, remind
myself of my value, and reinforce my
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resilience and fix this because if the
medical field was going to give up on
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me, that's a big shock.
So does yeah, And that's really I
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would say in the So that was
August of twenty twenty two, and that's
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basically when I had to have a
come to Jesus moment with myself and be
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like, Okay, what do I
do? And that's kind of where I
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felt like, Hey, you know
what, it's a mind body spirit connection
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that keeps us healthy. And the
yoga's great, and meditation is great,
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and eating healthy is great, but
there's some way that it all needs to
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to kind of come together, and
you need to really focus on your health
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and your wellness in a different way. And that's where that's when I found
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hypnotherapy. I had used it way
back in college after being raped, and
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that helped me go back to that
little two, three, four or five
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year old girl and be like,
hey, it's not your fault. You
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didn't do this, you weren't a
bad girl. The things that happened to
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you weren't your fault. And I
thought, well, hey, it worked
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then, maybe it could work now. And honestly, that's the journey that
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led to the book was because I
found that by creating hypnotic suggestion or placing
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hypnotic suggestions into the meditations that I
recorded for myself about my own health,
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about my blood, about my lungs, about the systems and my body that
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were challenged. All of my blood
markers in six months came back to normal
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ranges. I'm in what they call
spontaneous remission now. And that was kind
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of the light bulb that went off
of like, I'm sharing this with my
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friends, I'm writing meditations for friends, I'm helping friends lose weight, I'm
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helping friends do this. And then
someone's like, there's a better platform,
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PJ. You've got to figure out
a way for more people to know how
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they can help themselves than just you
know, these little things you're doing.
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And it was kind of like when
in a meditation state I came out,
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I thought, remember that girl who
wanted to be a writer, Remember that
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girl. She's still there. And
I really furiously in one weekend put Piil
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Hill and Reveal together without the last
chapter. It wasn't quite sure that ended
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what I want And I think,
understand this that at meditatation with with my
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mindset and with you you actually is
And then you know, you know after
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affirmation what that was. People need
to understand and are happening. He is
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occurring because of meditation, doing it
in different ways. Ways, you know,
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Fine reality is a very very way, or getting getting guidedgation was a
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very very way that that heal a
curR and the body can kill yourself.
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Matter of fact, experiences past can
literally really affect our health and the way
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the way to turn right around to
where mind sight and then going to go
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after allow allow that to literal our
lives and it can. And I think
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a very huge key to that is
to understand that it's not a linear journey
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though. It's not going to happen
just one meditation and I'm done. Yeah,
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I'm healed now. No. No, life itself is filled with highs
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and lows. There's a lot of
discoveries, there's a lot of challenges,
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and with each step that you take
towards finding yourself in a place where you
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can maybe just do one minute,
and then five minutes, and then a
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week later you're doing ten minutes of
meditation, you're going to lead yourself towards
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having a more authentic and more fulfilling
life. So when you honor yourself and
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you let meditation guide you to becoming
the most authentic version of yourself, that's
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a journey that's well worth embarking on
and healing from the impacts of whatever it's
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been in your life. It's a
profoundly personal journey. No one human being
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can tell you exactly what you need
to do to fix everything. You have
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to find your way back to yourself, and it's piece by piece. There's
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going to be setbacks, there's gonna
be moments where you question if you've made
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any progress. But again, healing
isn't linear. Each step forward, no
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matter how small, is a victory. And as long as you keep the
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mindset that life is full of victories, then true healing emotionally, physically,
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in all different directions can occur because
it's these limiting decisions. It's these limiting
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beliefs that we allow to creep in
and then we hold onto it like it's
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the gospel. It's such truth and
it's not. And that is honestly,
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I think it truly started with forgiving
myself. Yeah, someone shows me a
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question. I know you are talking
about about different No, I mean it
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started with paper elephants because I needed
something quick and easy with when life comes
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thunderstorming at you. So it's a
thirty sixty ninety second self regulation, so
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that no matter where I am at
a red light at the grocery store,
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if something triggers me, which is
what I think a lot of us suffer
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from if you've been traumatized, small
little things a car backfiring can throw me
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to the ground because it reminds me
of a gun going off. So someone,
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even my own child lifting his arm
to like show me a piece of
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paper of something he drew, will
create in me every little you know,
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all the physical reactions of the fact
that I'm about to get hit and you're
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never you can't predict when those things
in life are going to happen. And
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so it was out of trying to
write yoga sequences and beautiful meditations that the
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paper Elephants method was born so that
I could have this little tool for self
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regulation. And when I started sharing
it to other people and they were like,
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wow, yeah, this is really
great. This this helped me focus
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on myself for just this brief second, get my breath back, and get
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out of fight or flight. And
now it's become a daily part of my
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life. So I'm I'm, I'm
you know, I'm in something. What
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do I do? So? Let
me? Can I give you sixty seconds
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of your time? Can I take
it from you for a second? Sure?
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Sure? All right? So I'm
gonna ask you, please, doctor
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Doug to just take a moment and
imagine all of your negative thoughts, the
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things that you have told yourself,
the things others have told you, and
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imagine them and visualize them. Close
your eyes if you feel comfortable, and
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imagine little origami paper elephants. And
as you hail, set those paper elephants
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on fire with your strong breath.
Breathe in deeply through your nose and send
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your breath like a blazing fire to
your forehead, and as you exhale,
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sweep away all the ashes of those
paper elephants which are no longer strong enough
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to take hold in your mind.
Okay, okay, in through your nose,
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set the remaining paper elephants on fire, and as you exhale, you
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blow those ashes away, clearing them
away, so there's only realm for love
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and happiness to fill your forehead.
Oh that I love that. And you
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know, and again that really kind
of kind of havn't had my mindset having
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hail coming coming up to do that, you know, you know, to
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do that that method and really recogn
you know, that's why the mind comes.
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So here's here's the question comes to
right now, right now, is
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how someone develop that time my mindset
that because most say and how where we
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were that we go? We go, Okay, I need to need The
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biggest essential piece is forgiving yourself because
you're going to slip up, You're going
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to react instead of respond, and
you're sometimes more often than not, going
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to react in a way that you
might regret. You have to know that
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change is a process. There's going
to be setbacks, there's going to be
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victories, and what matters is your
commitment to your growth and your willingness to
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learn from each and every encounter.
You have to just simply understand that every
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day you can wake up and be
like, Oh, I'm so glad,
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I'm alive, the sun is shineing, or you can wake up and be
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like, oh, it's raining again. I don't even want to get out
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of bed. But it's a choice. Life is filled with choices, and
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as you navigate through the complexities of
life and relationships with people, that choice
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that you have to respond rather than
react is a powerful act of self love.
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It's an affirmation of your worth and
your capacity to rise above all of
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the negativity. You embrace your practice
of self care, of meditation, of
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your mindset with kindness and courage,
and you just basically end up getting to
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watch the world transform for the better. Heard that act of our environment are
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cause over over. We can be
act active on or we can we can
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act and what what what you to
move away away that effect, act,
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situation and literally emotions over all that
absolutely and I find you know people they
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everybody gives it different words. We
could argue about semantics, but there's no
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point moving forward. All you have
to do is remember the importance of setting
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intentions. And they're not just mere
wishes thrown into the wind, but they
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are powerful affirmations of your directions and
your desires. Intentions become like a compass
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that guide your steps, ensuring or
the individual that even when the path gets
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00:34:06.480 --> 00:34:10.800
foggy, rainy, thunderstorms come in, hurricanes, you name it. You
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have a sense of where you're headed
and you can find your path. If
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00:34:15.719 --> 00:34:19.840
you know your path, you stay
on it. And if you take a
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couple of steps back, just go
forward again. Celebrate each and every victory.
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And that honestly has been I wish
I wish that I had published a
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book at thirty five. I wished
I'd had the knowledge of what I have
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at fifty one, when I was
seventeen. But it didn't and there's no
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point to beating myself up over it. It's like forgive yourself, keep inhaling,
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keep exhaling, keep moving forward as
because as you have to gude God
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Gray so very much christ Christian again, I get okay, okay, So
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your question I had starts to talk, talk, pause and attect higher and
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I'm an island right now. A
lot of this go to the temple,
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pray, pray, you know,
you know who to help themselves God,
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God, but I know praying pray
for blessings and Chris Christians we pray for
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00:35:30.679 --> 00:35:34.960
bless blessed, and so many many
times I have a chrome God, God,
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you're my prayer prayers answer and why
your white would not have had handy
351
00:35:37.960 --> 00:35:43.400
to my question? But you're on
your aerience and even your faith because I
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00:35:43.480 --> 00:35:46.960
Resiver said that, how do how
do we help understand and here's my it's
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my opinion, how do how do
we help that we have to have our
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responsibility. We can't gug go over
to someone that I'm going to take care
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of even then considers and that's God
respons I for most of my life,
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especially you know, since being five
years old and understanding exactly who Jesus was
357
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as the best of a five year
old. I've come to believe and share
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with others that God answers prayers in
three ways. It's yes, no,
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or wait. If he says yes, it's because you are ready and that
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you have become the responsible, mature
individual to accept whatever it is you've been
361
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asking for. If he says no, you may or may not be doing
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what it takes to accept that gift
and use those blessings in the manner that
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would be beneficial for the world.
It might not be ecological for you to
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have that because you may not know
what to do with it, or you
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may be compromising other people in the
process. And if God says wait,
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then it's you have some growth to
do, you have some lessons to learn,
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and then when that process has been
completed, if you want to keep
368
00:37:14.360 --> 00:37:17.199
asking, you might get that yes
you're looking for. But to me,
369
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it's broken down in yes, no, or wait because we have been,
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in my opinion, given the free
choice, free will, and you have
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choices that you need to make,
and it's quite possible because I've done it,
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I've stuck myself back in a negative
relationship because it was easier and comfortable
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than to move forward. The physical
independence was the easy part, but the
374
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emotional part, the emotional independence hadn't
come, so I thought, well,
375
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I might as well just go back
into it. But that wasn't the best
376
00:37:50.199 --> 00:37:53.000
choice for me. And then I'm
looking around wondering why all these negative things
377
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are happening. But I want to
have a beautiful, resilient spirit, want
378
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to thrive and not just survive.
So I've come to believe that when I'm
379
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praying for something or I'm asking for
something, if the blessing isn't coming yet,
380
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I need to take a look at
what are my choices? Where have
381
00:38:14.519 --> 00:38:17.559
I put myself? Where have I
put my kids? What is it that
382
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I'm not doing to help make the
world a better place? Well, well,
383
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you know, you know, you
know what in my mind, My
384
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mind is testament, you know,
you know, saved all we can do.
385
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And look that's going going now,
And you get on that on the
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head until till you have done.
Spect you to reach yourself to the level
387
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of being able to put out that
energy and for infrequency to receive received.
388
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But once once yourself that point,
point, guess what's what that naturally come
389
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comes because now you're there, you
know, as you to receive it,
390
00:39:17.800 --> 00:39:23.840
it will come come. I think
that a lot of people if you if
391
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you don't have a faith in God
or some sort of higher power, it
392
00:39:29.039 --> 00:39:31.960
might just be your gut feelings.
And your gut can be a very powerful
393
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guide. And I believe that your
gut will whisper truth to your heart and
394
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you just have to learn to acknowledge
it. Trusting yourself is a huge first
395
00:39:44.280 --> 00:39:47.000
step towards recognizing when to hold on
to something or when to let go of
396
00:39:47.079 --> 00:39:52.320
it. Our emotions and our instincts
should be our guideposts, no matter what
397
00:39:52.440 --> 00:39:58.159
your faith is, and they warn
us when we're heading down a bad path
398
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into dangerous waters, and if we
ignore them, it can lead us down
399
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a path where our needs and our
safety is compromised. Well, and there's
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00:40:09.280 --> 00:40:21.920
the bush right experience serienstum Field and
able to get that energy and so forth,
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And that's like, you know,
it's the same same thing. You're
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00:40:27.119 --> 00:40:31.320
you're you're trying finding a point where
you are you're unimmunicating with whatever whatever your
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00:40:31.360 --> 00:40:37.679
believable allows you to communicate or with
or with whom, and as you have
404
00:40:37.840 --> 00:40:45.000
to have energies that That's why when
you start starting yourself, you're in receive
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00:40:45.400 --> 00:40:53.320
those very very things you are and
asking for. Absolutely. It requires acknowledging
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00:40:54.639 --> 00:41:00.559
that you might not know something,
or you might know something, and you
407
00:41:00.679 --> 00:41:05.760
might feel something that's profound with any
without any factual evidence to back it up.
408
00:41:06.920 --> 00:41:10.639
And so when you recognize either that
sinking feeling or that lifting feeling in
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00:41:10.760 --> 00:41:15.360
your gut, you might need to
follow it. And I think that that's
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00:41:15.400 --> 00:41:20.639
the it's the problem. People don't
trust themselves anymore. They're looking for all
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00:41:20.760 --> 00:41:37.719
in all these other places for answers
instead of within themselves. Message. I
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00:41:37.559 --> 00:41:42.920
feel that a lot of people out
there are just pushing for survival, but
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00:41:43.000 --> 00:41:49.039
there's more to it. Surviving is
like inhaling, and not exhaling, you're
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00:41:49.079 --> 00:41:54.760
going to blow up. Thriving is
the true essence of healing and empowerment.
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00:41:55.679 --> 00:42:00.920
So with each boundary you set,
it becomes a brick and that foundation of
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00:42:01.159 --> 00:42:07.639
having a beautiful, resilient spirit.
Thrivers are the ones lighting the way for
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others with our shared experiences and our
newfound wisdom. And I encourage everyone read
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00:42:15.000 --> 00:42:23.119
my book find your own sense of
how to thrive, because we need you
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00:42:23.239 --> 00:42:30.800
to help light the world. Oh
I love that so can be found where
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00:42:31.920 --> 00:42:36.280
Amazon, Barnes, and Noble,
most of your online retailers have it.
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00:42:36.880 --> 00:42:40.599
And again, this is for finding
emotional independence no matter what you've gone through
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00:42:40.639 --> 00:42:47.320
in your life, physically removing yourself
is not enough, okay. And if
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besides sides of the book to find
you, the easiest way is the word
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00:42:59.079 --> 00:43:02.320
the th H E. P J. Victor, v I C T O
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00:43:02.519 --> 00:43:07.480
R dot com. The P J. Victor dot com. You'll find all
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of the things I'm involved with nonprofit
wise, other books I'm writing and have
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00:43:13.000 --> 00:43:17.320
written what we do as a family
to help the world. Because it's not
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00:43:17.519 --> 00:43:21.639
just me. You've got three boys
that I'm raising to be world changers.
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00:43:22.519 --> 00:43:34.679
Uh, thank you so much and
all those things. Thank you so much
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for having me. Again. I
just appreciate the platform that you give others
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and so that we can try to
inspire and change the world. Thanks,
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00:43:46.199 --> 00:43:59.440
thanks for listening and again and you
know what that is worth reading reading.
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00:43:59.519 --> 00:44:01.559
Thanks you had to have a ra
it break. We're we're doing it,
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00:44:01.639 --> 00:44:13.239
doing it stand soon mhm.
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00:00:01.639 --> 00:00:04.759
At the end of the day,
it's not about what you have or even
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what you've accomplished. It's about what
you've done with those accomplishments. It's about
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who you've lifted up, who you've
made better. It's about what you've given
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00:00:13.839 --> 00:00:19.280
back. Denzel Washington, Welcome to
inspire Vision. Our sole purpose is to
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elevate the lives of others and to
inspire you to do the same. Excellent,
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Thank you so much for having me
located. So I am currently in
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Palma Sola, Florida on the Gulf
Coast. Oh. It is a beautiful
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sunny day. History do what you
what you are doing? Press and so
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brought you to the point writing a
book and doing then administration and those kind
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of things. So I was a
child with not a typical childhood as far
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as we look at America today.
I was raised in the seventies by a
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mother who unfortunately, at that time, when parents got divorced, they just
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gave children to the mothers. They
didn't really take a look at what might
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have been in the best interest of
the child. So I was raised by
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a drug addict and an alcoholic who
was trading my body to drug dealers for
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drugs. So I was basically what
we now call sexually trafficked starting around the
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age of two. And it wasn't
until I was five years old and taken
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by a neighbor to a vacation Bible
school that I looked up and I saw
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a picture on the wall. And
I told the woman, as I was
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gluing toothpicks to the little milk carton
making my little church, said I know
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that man, and she said,
oh, yes, of course that's Jesus.
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Said, I don't know his name. I just know he's the man
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that sits in the corner and cries
when the bad men are hurting me.
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So I didn't have a typical raising, and I escaped into books. I
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read a lot of books to escape
what I was living, and my father
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did. My biological father finally got
custody of me when I was eleven and
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a half. And yes, I
did do therapy and we tried to create
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a normal childhood for me. But
I wouldn't call it normal because I started
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acting and singing and modeling and being
on stages and being in commercial and it
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was a lot of fun. But
I think I was just hiding and masking
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pain and so after being in some
not wonderful relationships, since I couldn't fix
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mommy obviously, I decided to do
a missionary dating expedition and date boys with
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drug and alcohol problems. So I
ended up in a yoga class at a
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shelter for abused women and children.
When I ended up there, and I
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vowed to give back by volunteering.
One day after I became a certified yoga
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teacher, and so I wanted to
volunteer to help others learn to have peace
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within themselves and use their own breath
for that. Because I know I've spoken
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to many people over the years.
I could have taken a similar route as
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my mother. I could have because
of the abuse I endured become a drug
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addict or prostitute. But instead I
found how to yoke my breath to Jesus
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and to God. And so then
I started to teach group and private yoga
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classes and then become a Christian yoga
therapist, and I then became a certified
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mindfulness meditation teacher. And all of
the coaching that I've been doing is based
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on self regulation principles, because honestly, when you've been abused, no matter
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what age you have, a hard
time finding your breath, recognizing that you
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can breathe, and you become into
this constant state of fight or flight.
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And I have found that yoga helps
me and meditation helps me as an important
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piece of self care for me.
And I didn't want to just keep it
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to me. I wanted to share
it, and honestly, rather than wallow
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in self pity, I wanted to
inspire others wrote a book. And well,
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it's funny because I wanted to write
a book. I was actually thinking
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about this recently. I had written
it, you know, goals and dreams.
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What's the difference when you write it
down right? And I wanted to
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publish a book by the time I
was thirty five. However, life was
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happening and different things in life kept
happening, so it never happened. And
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I am super excited because it all
like it all fell together. This My
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first book was published just two weeks
before I turned fifty one, and then,
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because I was writing two other books
at the same time, not sure
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how this should all be. A
week and a half ago my publisher put
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my second book, which is actually
a letter to my twenty one year old
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son, in print. So now
i have two books in less than four
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weeks, and I'm ecstatic because they
are similar but different. And I love
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the fact that I now have these
two different audiences that I can hopefully inspires.
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Right. I don't know what got
published. I can tell you that
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feel heal and Reveal is definitely the
journey that I have been on for essentially
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fifty one years of finding emotional independence. I have learned and I know that
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many people, whether it be because
of trauma or because of just where they
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found themselves in life, you can
physically remove yourself from an abusive situation or
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an unsafe situation, but you're not
emotionally immediately healed. It doesn't happen.
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There is a well, there's just
numerous things that your body has gone through
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if you've been in a trauma state
long enough. There's a beautiful book called
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The Body Keeps Score. And unfortunately, the way our bodies work, we
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end up in physical disase. And
so this book was it was a it
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was a passion project because I took
the he said she set out. There's
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nothing in there about the relationships I've
been in, and I'm not telling my
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specific story. I'm really giving a
guide to anyone, be it a teenager,
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a dad, a mom, grandma. It doesn't matter what stage of
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life you're in. If you realize
that you are emotionally still tied to something
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that you don't want to be,
there's this ebb and flow and there are
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steps forward and back that you can
take to help you find emotionally dependence and
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my journey. Okay, great,
great, And you know you you mentioned
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then you mentioned mindset, and you
know, I know a lot a lot
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of people and the interviews it's like, you know what, I can't be
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do yoga. I just don't.
Don't. I can't even even without yoga
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yoga. But but many many think
things physical, physical tightening thing. And
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now now I'm learning and even as
its kind of kind of meditation. When
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when you talk you talk about yoga
and you're talk talking about medication, are
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you talk same, separate, similar? I would say separate from, but
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similar. And I think it's up
to the individual. So for me,
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I believe that yoga is your breath. I mean that's the bare bones.
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Everyone can do yoga because we all
breathe. Okay, okay, if there's
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physical limitations to your body, you
can still do yoga. I taught chair
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yoga, and I've taught to people
individuals in wheelchairs. Because what the mind
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sees, the body believes. So
if I'm sitting in the chair and I'm
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lifting my arms and breathing, and
you are sitting in a chair or in
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a wheelchair, and even if your
arms cannot physically move, as long as
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you're taking that inhale and that exhale, you are putting your body into a
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beautiful state. And as you've changed
your state, you can change your mindset.
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And as you change your mindset,
you can literally change your life.
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Okay, so let's talk. Let's
talk why it is. So there's I
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really think that mindset is a part
of finding congruence or agreement between the conscious
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and the unconscious mind. There are
many things that we do, breathing our
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heart, pumping blood, knowing to
move away from a hot stove. There's
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all these things that you can involuntary
and voluntarily do. But your mindset is
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incredibly powerful for healing as well as
just for daily survival. But see,
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I want to take it a step
further. I don't want to just survive.
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I want to be a thriver.
So if I'm going to thrive.
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Then I have to make sure that
I am at my purpose. And if
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I'm going to be at my purpose, then I can't be someone who's wallowing
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in self pity. And therefore,
the best way I have found is you
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know, people always talk about how
many muscles does it take to smile versus
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frown. Well, your your your
mindset is essentially, in its own right,
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a muscle. And so by exercising
your mind and adjusting your mindset with
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the power of not just positive thinking, but yoga and meditation, you literally
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can change your own self and then
that ripple effect changes the world talked my
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mindset. People experience life from from
conconscious experience those and they don't that they
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are very experiencing is nearly earlier conscience
conscious experiencea cetera. And if correct correctly
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my mind a situation and those to
come up. That's that's that's the thing
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that is necessarily any part of my
life anymore. And you that affirm information
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and my opinion, yes, yes
you are. Because here's the thing.
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I think that a lot of times
in our current society, people take a
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look at sensitivity as a weakness,
so you might get lumped in if you're
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someone who exudes a positive mindset that
oh that's an EmPATH or all these different
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like labels that they want to put
on people. And then living beliefs come
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out of that. And if you
have limiting beliefs, then your mindset becomes
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limited. And so I really want
to encourage people and inspire people to understand
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that sensitivity is a source of power. It's not a weakness. And once
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you understand how you interact with the
world and the people in it, well,
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then you have this incredible privilege of
being able to cultivate environments and relationships
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that honor your sensitivity rather than demean
it. And so you create these healthy
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boundaries within yourself by giving yourself unbelievably
beautiful attention by just sitting in meditation or
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exercising within the forms of yoga,
and you become an individual that has the
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power to not just believe in yourself, but to allow others is to see
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this person is different. Maybe I
want to be like that too, Yeah,
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child, and all potentially effect effect
such a secretive way. Now you
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know, I know it by a
bile on Earth three and heaven. Can
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you can talk to talk about that
a little come on that could could have
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potential. I will say that because
of my own childhood, A top goal,
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a top priority was when I get
older, I'm going to be a
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better mom than my mom was.
Well, the bar wasn't set that high.
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I was frightened to become a mother. What if it's ingrained in me?
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People talk about generational trauma and all
these things like what if I am
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just automatically this horrible mom. And
my father has now he's been in heaven
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almost twenty years, but before my
I guess it's been almost sixteen years.
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But before my oldest son was born, he told me, he said,
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all you have to do is the
exact opposite of your mother and you'll do
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great. And I was like,
oh, that's good advice. And my
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first son was born, and unfortunately, because of the person I had chose
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to be with for the rest of
my life, it didn't work out that
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way. We weren't together for the
rest of our lives and we were actually
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separated before I well, at around
I was six months pregnant at the time.
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So my son came into the world
with just me and a little tiny
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support system, a little village of
those who love me and A few years
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later, I did find someone else
and we got married, and fortunately there
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was a miscarriage, and that was
very devastating to me. And there were
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things going on in life, and
I already had a young one, so
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you just pick up and you go. And I didn't really grieve at all,
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I'll be very honest. Then when
my second son was born, it
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was like, ah, the rainbow
child, and you move forward, and
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now you have two children, and
you're going and you're going. And then
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I suffered a second loss of a
child, and it was kind of the
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same situation. I did have a
little bit of advice from someone in a
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Christian world that told me to write
a letter to God and ask him to
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accept these two children and love on
them until I can get to heaven.
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Okay, I'll say that might have
been helpful, and I kept going in
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life. And then with my third
son, he was actually a twin.
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Because of the shooting in Las Vegas
in twenty seventeen and the challenge that I
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had there, I ended up with
a staff infection from the shooting and I
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was bedridden and I ended up losing
one of the twins. And you were,
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you were, you were, and
literally of experience experience shooting. Yes,
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the best we can figure, there
was a young girl who got shot
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right in front of me and her
two friends. The bullet went through her
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abdomen. Two friends picked her up
and they ran off, and it sounded
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like a beasting. It felt like
a beasting, but there was so much
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chaos. I wasn't aware that the
blood on my white shirt was my own,
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and that my ear had what seems
to be the conclusion that we've all
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drawn is that the bullet from her
body grazed the corner of my ear and
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it looked like cauliflower, like a
boxer's ear. By the time the lockdown
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was over and I was able to
get home, and then when I ended
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up in the er, they were
like, whoa, we got to clean
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this wound, and here's some antibiotics, and those were obviously too strong for
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my body with being pregnant. And
then it wasn't long after that that my
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body decided that one of the twins
was not going to stay in my body.
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But that wasn't the end, because
then it was like this, the
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blood mixture apparently was not good,
and I ended up with a staff infection
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and it just It took almost six
months, almost the whole rest of the
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pregnancy, for my body to truly
try to find itself in a state of
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healing. And it wasn't done because
after my youngest was born, it wasn't
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postpartum depression. It was like all
of this loss and all of this trauma
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I had ever experienced was just coming
into like a firestorm all at once.
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And that is when I learned that
I had developed an autoimmune disorder that had
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kind of blossomed from all of these
experiences. But it was just the shooting
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was the final straw that broke the
camel's back, I guess, and there
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was. It was at least I
would say, close to two years of
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emotionally not feeling proper, physically not
feeling proper, and going through numerous diagnoses
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and medical things and nobody could really
say what exactly was wrong with me.
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And at that time, I was
trying to finally finish my yoga certifications,
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so that because I thought, you
know, my mindset was if I help
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others, then it's going to help
me. And I did did start to
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teach, but I was still struggling
health wise, and I finally I got
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to a doctor who told me you're
not gonna make it. Your body is
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shutting down, your your oxygenation levels
and your this, and you'r that in
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terms I didn't really understand, because
pretty much by the time my son was
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four, she is saying to me, get your will in order, and
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I'm like, wait a minute,
I have three pole and I am trying
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to end a very toxic relationship and
I don't want to leave this earth yet
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I'm not done. I know there's
a purpose to my life. So that
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is, honestly, it's a gut
wrenching feeling. And it was a very
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powerful wake up moment to me that
the body really does keep scoring and that
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the longer I kept reacting instead of
responding to things in my life, there
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wasn't going to be much life left. And I had to find a way
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to replenish my inner strength, remind
myself of my value, and reinforce my
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resilience and fix this because if the
medical field was going to give up on
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me, that's a big shock.
So does yeah, And that's really I
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would say in the So that was
August of twenty twenty two, and that's
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basically when I had to have a
come to Jesus moment with myself and be
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like, Okay, what do I
do? And that's kind of where I
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felt like, Hey, you know
what, it's a mind body spirit connection
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that keeps us healthy. And the
yoga's great, and meditation is great,
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and eating healthy is great, but
there's some way that it all needs to
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to kind of come together, and
you need to really focus on your health
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and your wellness in a different way. And that's where that's when I found
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hypnotherapy. I had used it way
back in college after being raped, and
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that helped me go back to that
little two, three, four or five
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year old girl and be like,
hey, it's not your fault. You
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didn't do this, you weren't a
bad girl. The things that happened to
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you weren't your fault. And I
thought, well, hey, it worked
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then, maybe it could work now. And honestly, that's the journey that
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led to the book was because I
found that by creating hypnotic suggestion or placing
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hypnotic suggestions into the meditations that I
recorded for myself about my own health,
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about my blood, about my lungs, about the systems and my body that
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were challenged. All of my blood
markers in six months came back to normal
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ranges. I'm in what they call
spontaneous remission now. And that was kind
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of the light bulb that went off
of like, I'm sharing this with my
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friends, I'm writing meditations for friends, I'm helping friends lose weight, I'm
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helping friends do this. And then
someone's like, there's a better platform,
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PJ. You've got to figure out
a way for more people to know how
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they can help themselves than just you
know, these little things you're doing.
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And it was kind of like when
in a meditation state I came out,
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I thought, remember that girl who
wanted to be a writer, Remember that
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girl. She's still there. And
I really furiously in one weekend put Piil
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Hill and Reveal together without the last
chapter. It wasn't quite sure that ended
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what I want And I think,
understand this that at meditatation with with my
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mindset and with you you actually is
And then you know, you know after
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affirmation what that was. People need
to understand and are happening. He is
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occurring because of meditation, doing it
in different ways. Ways, you know,
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Fine reality is a very very way, or getting getting guidedgation was a
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very very way that that heal a
curR and the body can kill yourself.
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Matter of fact, experiences past can
literally really affect our health and the way
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the way to turn right around to
where mind sight and then going to go
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after allow allow that to literal our
lives and it can. And I think
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a very huge key to that is
to understand that it's not a linear journey
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though. It's not going to happen
just one meditation and I'm done. Yeah,
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I'm healed now. No. No, life itself is filled with highs
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and lows. There's a lot of
discoveries, there's a lot of challenges,
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and with each step that you take
towards finding yourself in a place where you
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can maybe just do one minute,
and then five minutes, and then a
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week later you're doing ten minutes of
meditation, you're going to lead yourself towards
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having a more authentic and more fulfilling
life. So when you honor yourself and
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you let meditation guide you to becoming
the most authentic version of yourself, that's
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a journey that's well worth embarking on
and healing from the impacts of whatever it's
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been in your life. It's a
profoundly personal journey. No one human being
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can tell you exactly what you need
to do to fix everything. You have
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to find your way back to yourself, and it's piece by piece. There's
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going to be setbacks, there's gonna
be moments where you question if you've made
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any progress. But again, healing
isn't linear. Each step forward, no
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matter how small, is a victory. And as long as you keep the
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mindset that life is full of victories, then true healing emotionally, physically,
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in all different directions can occur because
it's these limiting decisions. It's these limiting
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beliefs that we allow to creep in
and then we hold onto it like it's
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the gospel. It's such truth and
it's not. And that is honestly,
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I think it truly started with forgiving
myself. Yeah, someone shows me a
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question. I know you are talking
about about different No, I mean it
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started with paper elephants because I needed
something quick and easy with when life comes
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thunderstorming at you. So it's a
thirty sixty ninety second self regulation, so
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that no matter where I am at
a red light at the grocery store,
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if something triggers me, which is
what I think a lot of us suffer
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from if you've been traumatized, small
little things a car backfiring can throw me
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to the ground because it reminds me
of a gun going off. So someone,
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even my own child lifting his arm
to like show me a piece of
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paper of something he drew, will
create in me every little you know,
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all the physical reactions of the fact
that I'm about to get hit and you're
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never you can't predict when those things
in life are going to happen. And
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so it was out of trying to
write yoga sequences and beautiful meditations that the
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paper Elephants method was born so that
I could have this little tool for self
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regulation. And when I started sharing
it to other people and they were like,
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wow, yeah, this is really
great. This this helped me focus
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on myself for just this brief second, get my breath back, and get
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out of fight or flight. And
now it's become a daily part of my
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life. So I'm I'm, I'm
you know, I'm in something. What
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do I do? So? Let
me? Can I give you sixty seconds
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of your time? Can I take
it from you for a second? Sure?
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Sure? All right? So I'm
gonna ask you, please, doctor
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Doug to just take a moment and
imagine all of your negative thoughts, the
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things that you have told yourself,
the things others have told you, and
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imagine them and visualize them. Close
your eyes if you feel comfortable, and
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imagine little origami paper elephants. And
as you hail, set those paper elephants
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on fire with your strong breath.
Breathe in deeply through your nose and send
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your breath like a blazing fire to
your forehead, and as you exhale,
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sweep away all the ashes of those
paper elephants which are no longer strong enough
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to take hold in your mind.
Okay, okay, in through your nose,
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set the remaining paper elephants on fire, and as you exhale, you
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blow those ashes away, clearing them
away, so there's only realm for love
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and happiness to fill your forehead.
Oh that I love that. And you
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know, and again that really kind
of kind of havn't had my mindset having
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hail coming coming up to do that, you know, you know, to
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do that that method and really recogn
you know, that's why the mind comes.
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So here's here's the question comes to
right now, right now, is
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how someone develop that time my mindset
that because most say and how where we
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were that we go? We go, Okay, I need to need The
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biggest essential piece is forgiving yourself because
you're going to slip up, You're going
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to react instead of respond, and
you're sometimes more often than not, going
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to react in a way that you
might regret. You have to know that
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change is a process. There's going
to be setbacks, there's going to be
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victories, and what matters is your
commitment to your growth and your willingness to
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learn from each and every encounter.
You have to just simply understand that every
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day you can wake up and be
like, Oh, I'm so glad,
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I'm alive, the sun is shineing, or you can wake up and be
319
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like, oh, it's raining again. I don't even want to get out
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of bed. But it's a choice. Life is filled with choices, and
321
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as you navigate through the complexities of
life and relationships with people, that choice
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that you have to respond rather than
react is a powerful act of self love.
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It's an affirmation of your worth and
your capacity to rise above all of
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the negativity. You embrace your practice
of self care, of meditation, of
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your mindset with kindness and courage,
and you just basically end up getting to
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watch the world transform for the better. Heard that act of our environment are
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cause over over. We can be
act active on or we can we can
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act and what what what you to
move away away that effect, act,
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situation and literally emotions over all that
absolutely and I find you know people they
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everybody gives it different words. We
could argue about semantics, but there's no
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point moving forward. All you have
to do is remember the importance of setting
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intentions. And they're not just mere
wishes thrown into the wind, but they
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are powerful affirmations of your directions and
your desires. Intentions become like a compass
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that guide your steps, ensuring or
the individual that even when the path gets
335
00:34:06.480 --> 00:34:10.800
foggy, rainy, thunderstorms come in, hurricanes, you name it. You
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have a sense of where you're headed
and you can find your path. If
337
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you know your path, you stay
on it. And if you take a
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couple of steps back, just go
forward again. Celebrate each and every victory.
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And that honestly has been I wish
I wish that I had published a
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book at thirty five. I wished
I'd had the knowledge of what I have
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at fifty one, when I was
seventeen. But it didn't and there's no
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point to beating myself up over it. It's like forgive yourself, keep inhaling,
343
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keep exhaling, keep moving forward as
because as you have to gude God
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Gray so very much christ Christian again, I get okay, okay, So
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your question I had starts to talk, talk, pause and attect higher and
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I'm an island right now. A
lot of this go to the temple,
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pray, pray, you know,
you know who to help themselves God,
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God, but I know praying pray
for blessings and Chris Christians we pray for
349
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bless blessed, and so many many
times I have a chrome God, God,
350
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you're my prayer prayers answer and why
your white would not have had handy
351
00:35:37.960 --> 00:35:43.400
to my question? But you're on
your aerience and even your faith because I
352
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Resiver said that, how do how
do we help understand and here's my it's
353
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my opinion, how do how do
we help that we have to have our
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responsibility. We can't gug go over
to someone that I'm going to take care
355
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of even then considers and that's God
respons I for most of my life,
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especially you know, since being five
years old and understanding exactly who Jesus was
357
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as the best of a five year
old. I've come to believe and share
358
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with others that God answers prayers in
three ways. It's yes, no,
359
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or wait. If he says yes, it's because you are ready and that
360
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you have become the responsible, mature
individual to accept whatever it is you've been
361
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asking for. If he says no, you may or may not be doing
362
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what it takes to accept that gift
and use those blessings in the manner that
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would be beneficial for the world.
It might not be ecological for you to
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have that because you may not know
what to do with it, or you
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may be compromising other people in the
process. And if God says wait,
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then it's you have some growth to
do, you have some lessons to learn,
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and then when that process has been
completed, if you want to keep
368
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asking, you might get that yes
you're looking for. But to me,
369
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it's broken down in yes, no, or wait because we have been,
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in my opinion, given the free
choice, free will, and you have
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choices that you need to make,
and it's quite possible because I've done it,
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I've stuck myself back in a negative
relationship because it was easier and comfortable
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than to move forward. The physical
independence was the easy part, but the
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emotional part, the emotional independence hadn't
come, so I thought, well,
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I might as well just go back
into it. But that wasn't the best
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choice for me. And then I'm
looking around wondering why all these negative things
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are happening. But I want to
have a beautiful, resilient spirit, want
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to thrive and not just survive.
So I've come to believe that when I'm
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praying for something or I'm asking for
something, if the blessing isn't coming yet,
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I need to take a look at
what are my choices? Where have
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00:38:14.519 --> 00:38:17.559
I put myself? Where have I
put my kids? What is it that
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I'm not doing to help make the
world a better place? Well, well,
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you know, you know, you
know what in my mind, My
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mind is testament, you know,
you know, saved all we can do.
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And look that's going going now,
And you get on that on the
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head until till you have done.
Spect you to reach yourself to the level
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of being able to put out that
energy and for infrequency to receive received.
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00:38:55.119 --> 00:39:00.519
But once once yourself that point,
point, guess what's what that naturally come
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comes because now you're there, you
know, as you to receive it,
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00:39:17.800 --> 00:39:23.840
it will come come. I think
that a lot of people if you if
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you don't have a faith in God
or some sort of higher power, it
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00:39:29.039 --> 00:39:31.960
might just be your gut feelings.
And your gut can be a very powerful
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guide. And I believe that your
gut will whisper truth to your heart and
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you just have to learn to acknowledge
it. Trusting yourself is a huge first
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00:39:44.280 --> 00:39:47.000
step towards recognizing when to hold on
to something or when to let go of
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00:39:47.079 --> 00:39:52.320
it. Our emotions and our instincts
should be our guideposts, no matter what
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00:39:52.440 --> 00:39:58.159
your faith is, and they warn
us when we're heading down a bad path
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00:39:58.280 --> 00:40:01.559
into dangerous waters, and if we
ignore them, it can lead us down
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00:40:01.599 --> 00:40:09.239
a path where our needs and our
safety is compromised. Well, and there's
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00:40:09.280 --> 00:40:21.920
the bush right experience serienstum Field and
able to get that energy and so forth,
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00:40:22.280 --> 00:40:25.960
And that's like, you know,
it's the same same thing. You're
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00:40:27.119 --> 00:40:31.320
you're you're trying finding a point where
you are you're unimmunicating with whatever whatever your
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00:40:31.360 --> 00:40:37.679
believable allows you to communicate or with
or with whom, and as you have
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00:40:37.840 --> 00:40:45.000
to have energies that That's why when
you start starting yourself, you're in receive
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00:40:45.400 --> 00:40:53.320
those very very things you are and
asking for. Absolutely. It requires acknowledging
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00:40:54.639 --> 00:41:00.559
that you might not know something,
or you might know something, and you
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00:41:00.679 --> 00:41:05.760
might feel something that's profound with any
without any factual evidence to back it up.
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00:41:06.920 --> 00:41:10.639
And so when you recognize either that
sinking feeling or that lifting feeling in
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00:41:10.760 --> 00:41:15.360
your gut, you might need to
follow it. And I think that that's
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00:41:15.400 --> 00:41:20.639
the it's the problem. People don't
trust themselves anymore. They're looking for all
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00:41:20.760 --> 00:41:37.719
in all these other places for answers
instead of within themselves. Message. I
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00:41:37.559 --> 00:41:42.920
feel that a lot of people out
there are just pushing for survival, but
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00:41:43.000 --> 00:41:49.039
there's more to it. Surviving is
like inhaling, and not exhaling, you're
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00:41:49.079 --> 00:41:54.760
going to blow up. Thriving is
the true essence of healing and empowerment.
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00:41:55.679 --> 00:42:00.920
So with each boundary you set,
it becomes a brick and that foundation of
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00:42:01.159 --> 00:42:07.639
having a beautiful, resilient spirit.
Thrivers are the ones lighting the way for
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00:42:07.840 --> 00:42:15.920
others with our shared experiences and our
newfound wisdom. And I encourage everyone read
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00:42:15.000 --> 00:42:23.119
my book find your own sense of
how to thrive, because we need you
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00:42:23.239 --> 00:42:30.800
to help light the world. Oh
I love that so can be found where
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00:42:31.920 --> 00:42:36.280
Amazon, Barnes, and Noble,
most of your online retailers have it.
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00:42:36.880 --> 00:42:40.599
And again, this is for finding
emotional independence no matter what you've gone through
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00:42:40.639 --> 00:42:47.320
in your life, physically removing yourself
is not enough, okay. And if
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00:42:52.400 --> 00:42:58.920
besides sides of the book to find
you, the easiest way is the word
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00:42:59.079 --> 00:43:02.320
the th H E. P J. Victor, v I C T O
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00:43:02.519 --> 00:43:07.480
R dot com. The P J. Victor dot com. You'll find all
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00:43:07.639 --> 00:43:12.840
of the things I'm involved with nonprofit
wise, other books I'm writing and have
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00:43:13.000 --> 00:43:17.320
written what we do as a family
to help the world. Because it's not
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00:43:17.519 --> 00:43:21.639
just me. You've got three boys
that I'm raising to be world changers.
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00:43:22.519 --> 00:43:34.679
Uh, thank you so much and
all those things. Thank you so much
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00:43:34.719 --> 00:43:37.519
for having me. Again. I
just appreciate the platform that you give others
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00:43:38.320 --> 00:43:46.159
and so that we can try to
inspire and change the world. Thanks,
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00:43:46.199 --> 00:43:59.440
thanks for listening and again and you
know what that is worth reading reading.
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00:43:59.519 --> 00:44:01.559
Thanks you had to have a ra
it break. We're we're doing it,
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00:44:01.639 --> 00:44:13.239
doing it stand soon mhm.
