March 31, 2026

Somatic Healing, Neurodivergence & Feminine Power with Lauren Salaun

Somatic Healing, Neurodivergence & Feminine Power with Lauren Salaun
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In this episode, Lauren shares her path from perfectionism and burnout to somatic healing, nervous system work, and reclaiming her feminine energy. She and Dr. Doug dive into neurodivergent brains, dating struggles of high-achieving women, and how to become truly magnetic in love and life.

Inspire Vision Podcast is broadcast on K4HD Radio (www.k4hd.com) part of Talk 4 Radio (www.talk4radio.com) on the Talk 4 Media Network (www.talk4media.com).

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WEBVTT

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This program is designed to provide general information with regards

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to the subject matters covered. This information is given with

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the understanding that neither the hosts, guests, sponsors, or station

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are engaged in rendering any specific and personal medical, financial, legal, counseling,

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professional service, or any advice. You should seek the services

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of competent professionals before applying or trying any suggested ideas.

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At the end of the day, it's not about what

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you have or even what you've accomplished. It's about what

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you've done with those accomplishments. It's about who you've lifted up,

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who you've made better. It's about what you've given back.

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Denzel Washington, Welcome to Inspire Vision. Our sole purpose is

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to elevate the lives of others and to inspire you

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to do the same.

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Lauren welcome.

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Thank you so much for having me. I'm really excited

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to be here today.

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You know, I'm really excited to have you on the

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show because as I've looked over your website and your

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bio and so forth, and your expertise, I.

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Find that it's really unusual.

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Okay, and I'll talk about that from the standpoint of

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wording that you use and descriptions that you use. But

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what I'd love for you to do is what I

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find is there's always a story, there's always a journey,

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and I'd love for you to share your journey with

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the audience, kind of give a background of who you are,

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and then kind of share your journey of what brought

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you to this point where you are helping women in

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the way that.

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You are absolutely absolutely okay.

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So I can be a little bit of a talker,

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so I'll give you the mini who I am now

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what I'm really passionate about. So Entrepreneur Speaker podcast hosts myself,

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transformational facilitator and Somatic life coach, and I do a

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lot of work with women, actually women when it comes

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to dating and relationships, so a lot of work on

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embodying feminine energy, femininity, all of that kind of stuff.

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And I really love to work with women in that

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capacity because I come from being very much a overachiever,

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boss babe, kind of like hustle, go go go, NonStop

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kind of woman. And while that resulted in a lot

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of really incredible things in my life and many ways,

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it also had a lot of things, you know, resulted

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in a lot of results that I didn't quite love

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in my life, especially related to marriage, relationships, that sort

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of thing. So I work with women to help them

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heal their nervous system, reprogram their subconscious mind, to really

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step into that innate magnetism that women have, and help

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women break free from that boss babe hustle culture kind

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of life, really own their worth and work on that

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worthiness journey, stand more firm in their power, and really

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invite more ease and flow into their lives.

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And I used.

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To focus just on personal growth with women and everything

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like that, and shifted over the last two years, I

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would say, into more dating and relationships because I have

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worked with so many women who, again they're successful go

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getters in so many areas of their lives, and you

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would see them and say like, wow, she's got it

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all together right, But who would struggle with dating, would

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struggle with relationships, and have very similar struggles when it

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came to relationships, and those being like I just can't

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meet a man who's manly enough or masculine enough for me,

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and stuff like that, and a lot of the times,

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these kinds of women, and I was one of these

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kinds of women as well, have a lot of similar patterns,

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similar wounds, similar blocks, and things that we can work

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on to make it so that that is no longer

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a big hurdle, I guess in their lives. And a

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little bit backing up to kind of my story and journey,

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I was the classic overachiever, perfectionist, workaholic like all of that.

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So somebody who was very stuck in my masculine energy.

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But also I was that way like my whole life, right,

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so excelled in sports, I did music, I did theater,

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I did was good at school like all the things

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perfectionists and all the things, and that was very encouraged,

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which is amazing. And as I'm sure you can imagine,

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fast forward to college or even early in my career,

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I'm double majoring, I'm workaholic like all that kind of stuff,

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and that brought a lot of amazing results, Like I said, success,

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good career, accolades, like money, all of that, But it

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was also me very much operating in a survival pattern

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in a lot of ways. And so so yeah, so

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live my whole life in this overachiever, workaholic kind of space.

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I ended up getting married in when was it ten

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years ago? Oh, my gosh, ten years ago at this

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point in twenty fifteen, to a good man and to

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a man who complimented me at the time in the

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sense that I was very much in my masculine energy

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and so he was very much in his feminine energy.

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And as I started to do a lot of the

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work on myself, the inner work, and the work I

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started doing was around the unworthiness, the perfectionism, the overachieving,

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all of that kind of stuff, and so it wasn't

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about like masculine feminine stuff at all.

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It was that stuff.

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But as I started to work on those things, I

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started to really like find more balance in that feminine

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and masculine energy. Because a lot of that high achieving,

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go go go, like success, drive, push, that kind of

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energy is the masculine energy. And so as I learned

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how to balance that out, I was because I was

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chasing a lot of that. Because there's nothing wrong, I

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want to be clear with the men and women listening,

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there's nothing wrong with being successful, being driven, anything like that,

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being excited and passionate about your career and having goals right,

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But for me, and I know for so many women

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too who can relate, I was chasing a lot of

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that for validation, because that's what made me feel worthy,

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feel valuable, all of that. So if you know, if

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I was successful, if people thought I was amazing, all

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these things that filled my tank, right instead of my

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tank being filled with through through other means. And so

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as I started to heal those pieces, that masculine feminine

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energy harmonization started to balance out more and then I

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started to do more work on that, and that's when

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I realized, oh my gosh, this is now that I'm

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not occupying the masculine energy in my relationship. It's not

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really we don't really have that in our relationship. And

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so spent a few years really working on that stuff

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and trying to figure it out, and ultimately decided to

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split up. And so I got divorced in twenty twenty.

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You know, while COVID was happening, like all all the

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things are going on at the same time. So COVID,

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COVID divorce, and that threw me into a lot of depealing,

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so even more depealing, right, and that's where I started

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to you know, I started to learn about somatic healing.

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I'm certified in somatic healing, which has been incredibly powerful

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and amazing for my own journey and end growth and

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started to learn a lot more about relationships, right, because

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I was fascinated by like, Okay, how did I get

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into what brought me here?

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Right?

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And if that was because it was ultimately my choice

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to end the marriage, if that wasn't the marriage that

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I wanted? Right, Like what brought me there? And now

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if I want something different, what growth do I get

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to step into to have a different outcome in the future, right,

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to change my what my relationship and dating life looks

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like from here on out.

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And so that that's the long but short way of

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how we got here.

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Okay, so double major. What were your majors?

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Communications and graphic design? So studio art, And it was

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the sort of thing where I went into. I went

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to a lovely liberal arts college in Santa Barbara, California, Like,

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can't complain, right, My school is a little private school

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in Montecito.

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We'd go to the beach all that, Like it was amazing.

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And I went in with a lot of of course,

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remember overachiever. I went in with a lot of AP

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credits and stuff like that, where I could have graduated

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a year early, right and say, my parents a year

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of private school tuition, but instead I chose to do

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more school. So I'm like, I've got all the room,

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let's do two majors instead of one. And so basically

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went through the course book and circled all the classes

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that sounded really cool to me, and then saw, okay,

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a lot of these line up with communications. Then that

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makes sense as the major I want to do, right

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And then I've always loved to be creative and do art,

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so I did graphic design as well.

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So did you go into some type of business or

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did you work for a major company or what happened there?

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And how doing that?

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Absolutely?

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So after college I went right into working on an

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AD agency. So I've always loved that intersection of like

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strategic communication and so like the psychology behind it when

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there's visual aspects as well. So went into working at

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a an AD agency and then went down the PR route,

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started working at a PR agency as well. Took a

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little break to well before the PR agency, took a

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little break because I was like, you know what, maybe

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advertising isn't the direction. Maybe I want to be more

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in the creative side of things. Went to New York

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City and did an internship program there that focused mainly

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on more of the art side of things, and it

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was there that I was like, you know what, the

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like artist direction, I think I want to keep that

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more as the hobby, like in my tool belt, but

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not the main thing. So went back into more the

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marketing side of things and was in PR for several

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years and then left that last company I worked for

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in when would that have been two thousand and.

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Fourteen?

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Yes, I think twenty fourteen to start my own business

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and in those you know, ten years now since doing

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my own thing, I owned my own agency for a while,

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and then did I also have had a fitness business too.

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I was an athlete for a long time, so I

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had a fitness business, but did PR for for several years,

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including my own agency, and started leaning into coaching more

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in twenty twenty and just this past year merged my

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agency with another agency, so I got to take that

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CEO hat off, which was really nice, and I get

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to focus a lot more of my energy on and

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my coaching work.

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Wow.

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Yeah, talk about someone who really wants to accomplish a lot.

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Yeah yeah, right.

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Well yeah, And I find that it's true of many

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many people and women.

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And I think it's interesting because I think it used

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to be much more about the how it looked and

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the accomplishments and that sort of thing, like I said,

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for the validation and the self worth and all of that.

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And really like the last you know, eight or so years,

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it's been so much more about like what feels exciting

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and interesting to me? Right because I'm not I'm not

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so much driven by oh, this is my dream job

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and that's what I have to do. It's and I'm

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going to do this forever. It's like, oh, in this

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season and chat like what am I passionate about?

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What's exciting?

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What?

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Yes, what can I see doing for a long time?

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But yeah, like I have been blessed to be able

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to trial lot of different things and going a lot

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of different directions, and you know, working for myself the

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last decade allows a lot.

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Of that freedom, which is which is really great.

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But I'm very very motivated by lifestyle and freedom and

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getting to you know, explore what's interesting to me.

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Well you know what I find fascinating And thank you

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for being so transparent.

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I think that's great. What I find interesting is, you know, as.

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We talk about and as you talk about you know,

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whatever those experiences were in childhood that caused you to have.

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To just do do do doom.

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In order to feel like you're accepted by people in

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the community and so forth. And yet, and you know,

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and we look back at that, and so many people

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now are trying to look at that experience as childs

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there as children and overcome that. And you know, we

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focus on overcoming that. And yet with your story, and

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I think it's true of many people people those things

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caused you to become the person that you became success wise,

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and then ultimately because you were able to do that,

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you it has allowed you to have that inner sense

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of understanding and transformation and now you're doing something entirely

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different that's making a huge difference for other ways.

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Absolutely.

244
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Yeah, So what are your thoughts about that?

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I mean, obviously, as you went through your own transformation,

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as we all do that, you know, we can approach

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that as being a victim of that negativity, or we

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can approach that with gratitude and realize, Okay, there's some

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positive things that came out of this, But I can

250
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always charted start a new chapter in my life, or

251
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I can have a new beginning.

252
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Yeah, absolutely, And so to be clear, right, Like, you know,

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the overachieving, perfectionist stuff and all of that.

254
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I think that those are patterns that have very.

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A lot of very positive side effects, right, and a

256
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lot of very socially acceptable and socially rewarded consequences or results. Right,

257
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So operating that way is going to get you ahead

258
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much more than like if I was an underachiever, I

259
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would say, right, so if I was a chronic underachiever,

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and you know that might have the outcome of that

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or the path that that could have taken me could

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have potentially been very far away from where I would

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have wanted to go, right. So I can absolutely like

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I absolutely feel so much gratitude for where I'm at

265
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in my life, how my life has gone, and everything

266
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like that. And so being able to see those patterns,

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oh this, you know, if I had done this from

268
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this way or all of that, it could have saved

269
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me some pain and burnout along the way in my

270
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adult life and stuff like that. But I absolutely can

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see that, Oh and those habits or those patterns did

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yield a lot of really really advantageous results in my life.

273
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Absolutely, right.

274
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But it's interesting because it's funny because I will talk

275
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to friends about this. I'll talk to my boyfriend about

276
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this and be like, gosh, like when I was in

277
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my early and mid twenties working sixty to eighty hours

278
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a week, and yes, I at the after a couple

279
00:15:33.440 --> 00:15:35.919
of years of that was like having a panic attack

280
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in the bathroom at work once a week, like that

281
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sort of thing.

282
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So it wasn't like a good or sustainable setup.

283
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But I was operating at that level for like several years.

284
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And whereas now.

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And I think a lot of people can probably relate

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to this, probably a lot of especially women. And I

287
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also find I'm going to get really niche here a

288
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lot of neurodivergent women who may.

289
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Relate to my story.

290
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Is then you're in your thirties and you're like, I

291
00:16:00.720 --> 00:16:02.600
can't possibly work more than twenty hours?

292
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What happened? Like ten years ago?

293
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I was able to work like a machine NonStop, and

294
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now I physically can't write. And so it's so interesting

295
00:16:11.960 --> 00:16:15.799
because I think now, right looking back, and like, oh,

296
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I yes, honed so many skills, right, I learned so

297
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much and honed a lot of.

298
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Skills that are very very helpful.

299
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In my life now, in my career now, And I

300
00:16:29.120 --> 00:16:32.000
usually I'm like, yeah, but that gear, right, that gear

301
00:16:32.159 --> 00:16:33.120
eighty hours a week.

302
00:16:33.399 --> 00:16:37.080
Now, it just I don't know what it would take

303
00:16:37.120 --> 00:16:37.720
to get me there.

304
00:16:39.000 --> 00:16:41.480
Okay, So I'm going to stop you here.

305
00:16:42.039 --> 00:16:44.360
This is something that I do to a lot of people,

306
00:16:44.480 --> 00:16:48.440
and my kids just laugh about it. But it's made

307
00:16:48.480 --> 00:16:53.480
a big difference. You've used a couple of words somatic coaching, yes,

308
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and neurodivergency.

309
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Yeah.

310
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And I guarantee you that there's many people that are

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listening that have no what that means, and even if

312
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they go to the dictionary, it may be different than

313
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what your definition is.

314
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So I'd love for you to number one, define what

315
00:17:10.839 --> 00:17:14.440
is sematic. What is sematic absolutely levine.

316
00:17:14.160 --> 00:17:16.640
Or coaching and so forth, not the coaching, but you

317
00:17:16.680 --> 00:17:20.000
know what is the somatic yeah? Yeah, and then what

318
00:17:20.200 --> 00:17:22.599
is neurodivergency in your mind?

319
00:17:22.640 --> 00:17:23.880
Absolutely absolutely?

320
00:17:23.920 --> 00:17:28.759
So Somatic coaching or somatic healing is about working with

321
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the body. So soma means body, and so somatic coaching

322
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or healing or there's also somatic therapy, right, people can

323
00:17:35.720 --> 00:17:37.839
can get licensed in it as well.

324
00:17:38.480 --> 00:17:40.680
Is work a lot about.

325
00:17:40.400 --> 00:17:44.000
Working with the nervous system and the subconscious mind. So

326
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a lot of getting in tune with your body and

327
00:17:49.359 --> 00:17:52.799
things like that. So an example of somatic healing or

328
00:17:52.799 --> 00:17:55.559
coaching or somatic work would be something like breath work,

329
00:17:56.000 --> 00:17:58.759
right like that kind of stuff, really being more in

330
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tune with the body with nervous system regulation.

331
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And what I've found as somebody and.

332
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This will go into the neurodivergence stuff, which I'll talk

333
00:18:09.240 --> 00:18:11.319
about in just a minute, but something that I found

334
00:18:11.400 --> 00:18:17.039
as somebody who is very intellectual, right, like I can

335
00:18:17.119 --> 00:18:20.119
intellectualize things very very well, understand things very very well.

336
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And I was noticing there were patterns in my life

337
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or outcomes in my life that were I didn't want, right,

338
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like the results I did not want, And I was like,

339
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why does this keep happening? I understand the exact steps

340
00:18:33.880 --> 00:18:36.400
that are happening that are making this happen. I understand

341
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that this is not the path I want to take,

342
00:18:37.960 --> 00:18:40.960
and yet here we are again, right And so for me,

343
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when that the solution, right And what was really effective

344
00:18:45.839 --> 00:18:49.039
for me and what I've found with other with clients friends,

345
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all of that is the somatic work gets it kind

346
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of gets the brain out of the way in a way.

347
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In a sense, you're not working with the conscious mind

348
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that understands all the things right, you're getting kind of

349
00:19:00.839 --> 00:19:04.400
beyond that to the subconscious part that is kind of

350
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steering the ship. So I found, at least for me,

351
00:19:09.079 --> 00:19:10.960
I haven't done a lot of talk therapy, but I've

352
00:19:11.039 --> 00:19:13.240
done a lot of somatic work and things like that.

353
00:19:13.240 --> 00:19:16.720
That but I've seen this with a lot of other people,

354
00:19:16.839 --> 00:19:19.599
is that, like talk therapy can get you so far

355
00:19:19.839 --> 00:19:22.200
right and you might be able to really.

356
00:19:22.480 --> 00:19:24.799
Not necessarily real effecting.

357
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By the way, in my opiny, exactly exactly.

358
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And so that's where I think somatic work is such

359
00:19:31.039 --> 00:19:34.039
such a powerful tool. And I got into it for

360
00:19:34.160 --> 00:19:36.000
my own healing because I was like, there are things

361
00:19:36.039 --> 00:19:38.160
that I am just sick of dealing with and sick

362
00:19:38.200 --> 00:19:41.400
of thinking about, and I would like them to be eliminated, right,

363
00:19:41.400 --> 00:19:41.839
I would like.

364
00:19:41.839 --> 00:19:44.640
To solve this problem. And so somatic work really helped.

365
00:19:44.480 --> 00:19:46.440
Me with that, and then I got certified so that

366
00:19:46.480 --> 00:19:50.599
I could share it with other people. And then Neudivergence

367
00:19:51.039 --> 00:19:56.079
is just variations in how the brain works. So you'll

368
00:19:56.119 --> 00:20:01.279
have neurodivergent brain operating system and maybe a neurotypical so

369
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somebody who operates more quote unquote normal, I would say,

370
00:20:04.640 --> 00:20:06.960
but I don't don't like to like throw those normal

371
00:20:07.000 --> 00:20:12.319
abnormal kind of words around there. But neurodivergence can include

372
00:20:12.480 --> 00:20:20.200
a variety of conditions like dyslexia, autism, ADHD, things like

373
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that where the brain is actually often from a And

374
00:20:23.319 --> 00:20:25.880
I'm not an expert in this, I just live with it,

375
00:20:25.960 --> 00:20:27.680
and I've done a lot of research on it, so

376
00:20:27.720 --> 00:20:30.240
I know a lot from lived experience and just my

377
00:20:30.279 --> 00:20:33.799
own fascination. But a lot of the times, either people

378
00:20:33.839 --> 00:20:36.960
are born this way or there are like very early

379
00:20:37.079 --> 00:20:41.519
stage developmental things that happen that are going to kind

380
00:20:41.519 --> 00:20:44.799
of rewire how the brain operates.

381
00:20:45.359 --> 00:20:50.319
Isn't it interesting, especially neural divergence, And when I was

382
00:20:50.319 --> 00:20:52.799
looking at your bio and so forth, I really did

383
00:20:52.839 --> 00:20:56.119
a little bit of research on that, and it's fascinating.

384
00:20:56.119 --> 00:20:58.319
And you mentioned it. You know, You've got all of

385
00:20:58.359 --> 00:21:07.480
these diagnoses of neurodivergence, ADHD, autism, so on and so forth.

386
00:21:08.000 --> 00:21:12.440
And what I have found is so often when we

387
00:21:12.519 --> 00:21:17.839
see something or experience something that isn't quote normal.

388
00:21:18.759 --> 00:21:20.799
That we have to put a label on it.

389
00:21:21.119 --> 00:21:21.640
Yeah.

390
00:21:21.799 --> 00:21:25.759
Now, you know, I had a son who when we

391
00:21:25.759 --> 00:21:28.359
were moving and going into high school and leaving the

392
00:21:28.440 --> 00:21:31.839
particular school I was at and he had been challenged

393
00:21:31.839 --> 00:21:36.519
a little bit with some stuff, and you know, I said, listen,

394
00:21:36.799 --> 00:21:39.079
I'm just curious, and it was not going to make

395
00:21:39.079 --> 00:21:41.119
a difference, but I'm curious, so go ahead and test.

396
00:21:41.240 --> 00:21:44.000
And so he got tested, and he came back, well,

397
00:21:44.079 --> 00:21:46.039
we need to put him on this medication and so

398
00:21:46.119 --> 00:21:48.319
on and so forth, you know that type of thing.

399
00:21:49.000 --> 00:21:53.160
And when we moved and started a new school, I

400
00:21:53.240 --> 00:21:56.839
bought him a little I don't even know what you

401
00:21:56.920 --> 00:22:00.960
call it now, but we use our phones now. But

402
00:22:01.000 --> 00:22:03.839
when he went to school, he used that in order

403
00:22:03.920 --> 00:22:06.119
to do his homework, and actually he learned how to

404
00:22:06.200 --> 00:22:08.640
print on the printers in the school as well as

405
00:22:08.680 --> 00:22:15.680
control the TVs sometimes. But bottom line, bottom line, he

406
00:22:15.720 --> 00:22:19.200
did not go on any medication and he was not

407
00:22:19.400 --> 00:22:24.519
labeled with any of those diagnoses because what I learned

408
00:22:24.519 --> 00:22:27.720
as I had attended different conferences and so forth in

409
00:22:27.720 --> 00:22:33.839
my idental profession, is that he was just a spatial thinker. Now,

410
00:22:34.039 --> 00:22:36.240
even today, as I talked to him, he's starting to

411
00:22:36.319 --> 00:22:39.920
label himself a little bit with some of those things.

412
00:22:41.240 --> 00:22:45.039
And there's no question that there are real issues like that.

413
00:22:45.440 --> 00:22:48.240
But I find it's interesting that when we find that

414
00:22:48.279 --> 00:22:53.240
we think differently that we get labeled and sometimes that

415
00:22:53.400 --> 00:22:59.839
labeling is not accurate or can affect our overall sense

416
00:23:00.079 --> 00:23:04.480
of who we are. Whereas as I looked up neurodivergent women,

417
00:23:05.279 --> 00:23:08.480
here's what I found and you probably already know this.

418
00:23:09.240 --> 00:23:14.920
Exceptional emotional intelligence and empathy, creativity and outside the box

419
00:23:15.039 --> 00:23:20.200
problem solving, deep focus on meaningful or passion driven work.

420
00:23:20.599 --> 00:23:22.599
I love words of affirmation, keep going.

421
00:23:22.880 --> 00:23:29.240
Strong intuition and connection to subtle detail or patterns. And

422
00:23:29.240 --> 00:23:33.160
it says they struggle with overstimulation, anxiety, low self esteem

423
00:23:33.559 --> 00:23:37.079
because they're not understood, or exhaustion trying to live up

424
00:23:37.160 --> 00:23:43.359
to the neurotypical expectations. But the reality is is it's

425
00:23:43.359 --> 00:23:47.720
a unique ability that if you look at the positive

426
00:23:48.279 --> 00:23:50.279
side of that, it's amazing.

427
00:23:51.039 --> 00:23:51.920
Oh yeah.

428
00:23:51.960 --> 00:23:54.000
And so I will say with the whole with labeling

429
00:23:54.039 --> 00:23:56.279
and stuff like that, because I don't like to do

430
00:23:56.359 --> 00:23:58.920
a ton of labeling either. And I will say, like

431
00:23:59.480 --> 00:24:01.960
when we're on social media and you're scrolling and all

432
00:24:02.000 --> 00:24:04.680
of that, like it's what helps somebody be like, oh

433
00:24:04.720 --> 00:24:07.119
this might be for me or I can relate to this, right,

434
00:24:07.160 --> 00:24:10.160
So like just from a communication standpoint, it it can

435
00:24:10.200 --> 00:24:13.759
be helpful but the labelings for me. And when I

436
00:24:13.920 --> 00:24:17.440
kind of took ownership of the neudivergent label for myself,

437
00:24:17.960 --> 00:24:20.720
it as I started to learn more about these things

438
00:24:20.720 --> 00:24:23.240
and in my own healing and stuff and start you know,

439
00:24:23.400 --> 00:24:27.200
getting fed things from my algorithm whatever social media platform

440
00:24:27.240 --> 00:24:29.680
I was on, I was like, huh.

441
00:24:29.119 --> 00:24:33.799
That sounds familiar. This is very helpful. Does this apply

442
00:24:33.920 --> 00:24:35.039
to me? Interesting?

443
00:24:35.119 --> 00:24:38.039
And as I did more research and like you know,

444
00:24:38.079 --> 00:24:41.480
spoke with professionals and stuff like that, realized, oh my gosh,

445
00:24:41.519 --> 00:24:45.279
like this this makes my life experience and makes me

446
00:24:46.119 --> 00:24:49.880
make so much more sense. And so for me, it

447
00:24:49.960 --> 00:24:54.079
was something that helped me to understand myself in many

448
00:24:54.160 --> 00:24:57.519
many ways, understand understand my entire life through a very

449
00:24:58.039 --> 00:25:00.000
much different lens, and a lens that made a lot

450
00:25:00.039 --> 00:25:00.759
lot more sense.

451
00:25:01.480 --> 00:25:03.279
And also because.

452
00:25:03.359 --> 00:25:06.160
I agree, I think that for me, at least, my

453
00:25:06.319 --> 00:25:09.599
neurodivergence and I will say too, like, there are people

454
00:25:09.680 --> 00:25:14.440
who are neurodivergent and it is a very big handicap

455
00:25:14.519 --> 00:25:17.440
in their lives, or they're handicapped as a result of it, right,

456
00:25:17.519 --> 00:25:20.759
or it's just a big, big impediment. So I'm very

457
00:25:21.000 --> 00:25:24.359
blessed and grateful to very incredibly high functioning and to

458
00:25:24.400 --> 00:25:29.079
where I now through thankfully no medication or anything like that,

459
00:25:29.119 --> 00:25:32.079
but through a lot of healing work, awareness education, like

460
00:25:32.480 --> 00:25:36.640
all of that, amout a place where I get to

461
00:25:36.720 --> 00:25:39.200
really lean into the benefits of it, and I get

462
00:25:39.240 --> 00:25:43.119
to really like the cool parts of it and the excite,

463
00:25:43.200 --> 00:25:44.839
the fun parts of it. The stuff that I think

464
00:25:44.880 --> 00:25:47.279
is just fascinating and wouldn't want to change at all,

465
00:25:47.559 --> 00:25:49.759
which I think are part of that. I get to

466
00:25:49.880 --> 00:25:52.880
like crank those up a lot, and the stuff that

467
00:25:53.839 --> 00:25:58.079
makes it very challenging, that stuff isn't that challenging anymore

468
00:25:58.079 --> 00:26:02.200
because I've learned how to manage it right. And it's

469
00:26:02.319 --> 00:26:06.279
tough beat sometimes because it's you know, I think people

470
00:26:06.359 --> 00:26:09.359
sometimes can think, oh, we'll just like heal it and

471
00:26:09.400 --> 00:26:11.160
fix it or blah blah blah that sort of thing,

472
00:26:11.160 --> 00:26:13.400
and it's like, no, no, no, Like, my brain is actually different,

473
00:26:13.640 --> 00:26:16.200
you know, like and people who are like this, like

474
00:26:16.240 --> 00:26:19.079
my our brains and how they're wired are actually different.

475
00:26:19.119 --> 00:26:22.480
And yes, there's healing that you can do, absolutely, but

476
00:26:22.599 --> 00:26:25.480
I think it's more about learning how to, yes, doing

477
00:26:25.519 --> 00:26:28.920
the healing work, but then learning how to like dance

478
00:26:29.039 --> 00:26:33.000
with your uniqueness and the other part to that too,

479
00:26:33.079 --> 00:26:38.400
is like, you know, neurodivergent versus neurotypical. Everyone's brain is different, right,

480
00:26:38.519 --> 00:26:41.200
So like what it's like in my brain is going

481
00:26:41.279 --> 00:26:43.720
to be so different than anyone else's brain. And so

482
00:26:43.839 --> 00:26:47.400
keeping that in mind, even a neurotypical person to another

483
00:26:47.519 --> 00:26:52.279
neurotypical person, like their brains operate differently. So I think

484
00:26:52.359 --> 00:26:58.079
like really owning your uniqueness and understanding yourself and then

485
00:26:58.160 --> 00:27:01.119
keeping in mind that anyone whether it's your the person

486
00:27:01.160 --> 00:27:04.000
you're in a relationship with, your family, members, friends, clients, whoever,

487
00:27:04.079 --> 00:27:07.279
it is like their brains are going to operate how

488
00:27:07.319 --> 00:27:11.400
their brains operate, and you get to understand, you know,

489
00:27:11.480 --> 00:27:14.440
do your best to understand that so you can work.

490
00:27:14.240 --> 00:27:15.279
With it well.

491
00:27:15.319 --> 00:27:18.640
And you know what's interesting, Now we're talking about three

492
00:27:18.680 --> 00:27:23.160
different things here. We're talking about women who experience greater

493
00:27:23.279 --> 00:27:26.039
masculinity in their life and have not really been able

494
00:27:26.079 --> 00:27:30.759
to tap into the feminine aspect. We're talking about neurodivergency.

495
00:27:30.880 --> 00:27:35.640
We're talking about you know, somatic healing and so forth.

496
00:27:36.279 --> 00:27:40.559
But here here's let's go back to relationships for a minute. Okay,

497
00:27:41.200 --> 00:27:43.680
you know you talked about the fact that you really

498
00:27:44.240 --> 00:27:47.720
had that masculine energy, and we're not really tapped into

499
00:27:47.759 --> 00:27:51.680
the feminine energy that you had. And you know, I

500
00:27:51.720 --> 00:27:54.920
think with the women's movement, and please forgive me if

501
00:27:54.960 --> 00:27:59.799
I say anything that might be, but it seems to

502
00:27:59.880 --> 00:28:03.960
like with the women's movement, and justifiably so, because of

503
00:28:04.039 --> 00:28:11.000
the patriarchal history of our culture, that in my mind

504
00:28:11.119 --> 00:28:15.200
is not valid that you know, we have the women's movement,

505
00:28:15.440 --> 00:28:19.720
they really were forced to move into that masculinity role

506
00:28:19.799 --> 00:28:24.519
in order to just experience their own personal identity. And

507
00:28:24.599 --> 00:28:28.559
yet what happens then is, as you did, you know,

508
00:28:28.680 --> 00:28:31.759
you end up marrying someone that's usually you're attracted to

509
00:28:31.799 --> 00:28:35.920
your opposite in some senses, at least initially until you

510
00:28:35.960 --> 00:28:40.599
figure things out, and so all of a sudden they

511
00:28:40.680 --> 00:28:46.440
become they become the masculine part of a relationship. Well,

512
00:28:46.519 --> 00:28:49.799
it's fine if you've got someone a man who's more

513
00:28:50.519 --> 00:28:54.200
on that right brain, you know, feminine whatever you want

514
00:28:54.200 --> 00:29:00.480
to call it aspect, but so many times those women

515
00:29:00.960 --> 00:29:05.119
also end up marrying a masculine man, and that becomes

516
00:29:05.160 --> 00:29:08.440
a major issue because then on the man's side, they're

517
00:29:08.480 --> 00:29:12.680
looking for that natural feminine woman, who's kind, who's loving,

518
00:29:12.799 --> 00:29:17.680
who's all of that that is not being experienced because

519
00:29:17.720 --> 00:29:21.359
of the masculinity focus of their wife or their their

520
00:29:21.559 --> 00:29:22.440
you know, a spouse.

521
00:29:23.759 --> 00:29:24.920
What are your thoughts on that?

522
00:29:26.880 --> 00:29:27.599
So many thoughts.

523
00:29:27.680 --> 00:29:33.599
So I agree that you know, the women's movement, feminism,

524
00:29:33.640 --> 00:29:36.400
that kind of stuff, Like I will say, it's not

525
00:29:36.920 --> 00:29:39.440
I don't know, complicated, but I want to say, like,

526
00:29:39.599 --> 00:29:42.119
you know, a lot of that that happened, like you know,

527
00:29:42.960 --> 00:29:45.359
changes that my mom saw in her life and stuff

528
00:29:45.400 --> 00:29:48.680
like that, Like I am so grateful that so many

529
00:29:48.680 --> 00:29:52.519
people fought hard so that like women in my generation,

530
00:29:52.680 --> 00:29:56.119
we have choices, right, we have so many choices we do,

531
00:29:56.440 --> 00:29:59.039
you know, whatever we want with our lives, all that

532
00:29:59.079 --> 00:30:01.599
kind of stuff. Get get bank accounts, like by property

533
00:30:01.720 --> 00:30:03.519
whatever it is, right, like we can we can do

534
00:30:03.640 --> 00:30:07.160
all these things from a like legal standpoint and right

535
00:30:07.240 --> 00:30:10.400
standpoint and all of that. And I will say I

536
00:30:10.440 --> 00:30:13.960
completely agree to your point as well, that it pushed

537
00:30:14.000 --> 00:30:18.720
a lot of women like in that like pursuit of

538
00:30:19.880 --> 00:30:22.839
finding their own identity or finding you know, our own

539
00:30:22.839 --> 00:30:25.880
identity as women and stuff like that. Women were pushed

540
00:30:25.960 --> 00:30:29.160
into the direction of like be more like men, right,

541
00:30:29.400 --> 00:30:32.880
instead of like like owning more what it means to

542
00:30:32.880 --> 00:30:35.680
be a woman, it was really like, go out and

543
00:30:35.759 --> 00:30:39.400
do the same things as men because you're the same, right,

544
00:30:39.400 --> 00:30:41.680
And I know it wasn't like you're the same, but

545
00:30:41.680 --> 00:30:46.960
but that like message of equality got pushed, as I

546
00:30:47.000 --> 00:30:49.640
think in a sense, and obviously I wasn't there witnessing it,

547
00:30:49.680 --> 00:30:52.680
but encouraged a lot of women to act like men

548
00:30:52.799 --> 00:30:55.519
and to step into those more masculine roles in a

549
00:30:55.519 --> 00:30:58.839
lot of way, which I think, you know, I'm seeing

550
00:30:58.880 --> 00:31:01.680
in my generation a lot of women who went that

551
00:31:01.759 --> 00:31:05.799
like boss, babe, go getter kind of of life and

552
00:31:05.880 --> 00:31:08.200
chose that path and then are like, oh, but why

553
00:31:08.720 --> 00:31:11.920
why do I struggle with relationships? Why am I still single?

554
00:31:12.359 --> 00:31:14.480
I would have wanted a family. Why did I spend

555
00:31:14.519 --> 00:31:18.599
so much time like grinding in my career and stuff

556
00:31:18.640 --> 00:31:21.400
like that, like why wasn't I prioritizing this earlier? Why

557
00:31:21.440 --> 00:31:23.920
didn't I choose better earlier in my life?

558
00:31:23.920 --> 00:31:24.599
And stuff like that.

559
00:31:24.720 --> 00:31:28.079
And so I think that on the one hand, like, yes,

560
00:31:28.279 --> 00:31:32.279
it's important for women to have equal rights and choices

561
00:31:32.319 --> 00:31:37.119
and all of that, absolutely, and yes, the Women's movement

562
00:31:37.160 --> 00:31:42.920
I think pushed women to pursue independence the way that

563
00:31:42.960 --> 00:31:49.200
it looks for men. Also, wow, which was to our detriment, right, like,

564
00:31:49.279 --> 00:31:51.079
and that's not that, you know, I think there's a

565
00:31:51.079 --> 00:31:54.599
lot of and especially like in the work that I

566
00:31:54.880 --> 00:32:00.599
do again, like I'm a very like independent and self

567
00:32:00.599 --> 00:32:04.799
sufficient women and stuff like that, and so like I've

568
00:32:04.839 --> 00:32:06.799
done a lot of work to undo a lot of

569
00:32:06.799 --> 00:32:10.079
that for myself, just that programming. But I see a

570
00:32:10.119 --> 00:32:15.359
lot of women working too or like struggling with like

571
00:32:15.440 --> 00:32:20.000
how like undoing that programming because they're finding, wait a second,

572
00:32:20.000 --> 00:32:22.759
this isn't this isn't the life I want. Sure I've

573
00:32:23.000 --> 00:32:24.680
made a lot of money or I've had this success

574
00:32:24.720 --> 00:32:27.319
and stuff like that, but like this isn't what I want,

575
00:32:27.640 --> 00:32:29.720
you know, and it's which is scary.

576
00:32:29.839 --> 00:32:30.200
I think.

577
00:32:30.720 --> 00:32:33.759
Well, and I've even seen the discrimination at least you know,

578
00:32:33.960 --> 00:32:37.640
in my generation and a few generations before me or

579
00:32:37.680 --> 00:32:42.640
after me, where there's really a discrimination and almost bullying

580
00:32:42.920 --> 00:32:46.279
of women who want to be at home, have children,

581
00:32:46.759 --> 00:32:51.720
be a homemaker and they're kind of put down because

582
00:32:52.039 --> 00:32:53.799
they really have achieved.

583
00:32:53.400 --> 00:32:54.880
That feminine side for them.

584
00:32:55.200 --> 00:32:59.200
And how do you help those women that are experiencing

585
00:32:59.279 --> 00:33:02.000
that sense of you know, I just want to be

586
00:33:02.039 --> 00:33:04.160
a mom, I want to be a wife, I want

587
00:33:04.200 --> 00:33:06.720
to be a homemaker. I want to be able to

588
00:33:07.200 --> 00:33:10.519
show forth that love and kindness and so forth. How

589
00:33:10.519 --> 00:33:14.559
do you help them overcome the societal expectations and in

590
00:33:14.599 --> 00:33:16.400
some respects discrimination.

591
00:33:17.799 --> 00:33:22.599
Yeah, I mean, ultimately, I think, and it's probably easier

592
00:33:22.640 --> 00:33:26.119
said than done for a lot of people. But the

593
00:33:26.119 --> 00:33:30.480
only people person like forces you need to be looking

594
00:33:30.519 --> 00:33:34.720
for approval from and worried about, like I would say,

595
00:33:34.759 --> 00:33:38.039
are gods, and then like the closest people in your life,

596
00:33:38.079 --> 00:33:42.480
So whether that's a spouse, yourself, right, so God, yourself,

597
00:33:42.680 --> 00:33:45.480
maybe your spouse, your closest friends, like that sort of thing,

598
00:33:45.559 --> 00:33:48.240
and not worrying about or putting a lot of weight

599
00:33:48.319 --> 00:33:51.640
on the outside chatter. And again easier said than done,

600
00:33:51.640 --> 00:33:56.720
because you might have family members who are bullying you

601
00:33:57.240 --> 00:33:59.559
or talking down to you because that's that's what you

602
00:33:59.599 --> 00:34:02.319
want to sue instead of maybe you know, maybe less

603
00:34:02.319 --> 00:34:05.640
focused on a career and more focused on relationship and

604
00:34:05.640 --> 00:34:09.639
stuff like that. And I would say just getting when

605
00:34:09.679 --> 00:34:12.480
you get really anchored in the vision you want for

606
00:34:12.519 --> 00:34:16.519
your life, allowing that to lead you and trusting that.

607
00:34:17.360 --> 00:34:22.119
I would also say to that point too, that I

608
00:34:22.159 --> 00:34:26.039
think because I see a lot of discourse on social

609
00:34:26.079 --> 00:34:28.480
media because you know, social media is so like black

610
00:34:28.519 --> 00:34:32.320
and white and extremes and stuff like that. Right of

611
00:34:32.400 --> 00:34:36.920
like people talk, whether it's women or people like wanting

612
00:34:36.960 --> 00:34:42.519
to coach women around, like just marry a wealthy provider

613
00:34:42.599 --> 00:34:44.880
man and don't worry about it and you'll have this

614
00:34:45.000 --> 00:34:47.519
soft life and not worry stress about anything or anything

615
00:34:47.559 --> 00:34:51.199
like that. And while like at pure face value, sure

616
00:34:51.280 --> 00:34:55.840
that sounds nice and still having to live in reality,

617
00:34:56.119 --> 00:35:00.239
right and be responsible and stuff like that. And so

618
00:35:00.880 --> 00:35:05.519
I think for women, like it's very good to have

619
00:35:05.719 --> 00:35:09.639
a certain level of education, to have skills yourself in

620
00:35:09.679 --> 00:35:11.639
case you need it or if you get I don't know,

621
00:35:11.760 --> 00:35:15.639
bored or anything like that. But also, right, I think

622
00:35:15.679 --> 00:35:20.599
there is a lot of risk potentially to putting your

623
00:35:20.880 --> 00:35:27.320
entire livelihood, future, everything like that dependent on one person

624
00:35:27.480 --> 00:35:30.119
that's not you. And that doesn't mean I'm not meaning

625
00:35:30.159 --> 00:35:33.159
to say don't trust your partner or your husband anything

626
00:35:33.199 --> 00:35:37.440
like that, but it's I think a good idea to

627
00:35:37.519 --> 00:35:39.440
still have like some of it, whether it's your own

628
00:35:39.480 --> 00:35:42.239
money or your own stuff, or your own career or

629
00:35:42.280 --> 00:35:45.239
skills to be able to fall back on just in

630
00:35:45.280 --> 00:35:47.920
case because stuff happens, things don't always.

631
00:35:47.559 --> 00:35:49.199
Go according to plan all of that.

632
00:35:49.760 --> 00:35:53.239
There are plenty of stories of women whose relationships have

633
00:35:53.320 --> 00:35:56.719
started out like that perfect fairy tale and then went

634
00:35:56.760 --> 00:35:59.159
to a very dark place and stuff. And so I

635
00:35:59.239 --> 00:36:03.280
think it's just good to be to also, like you know,

636
00:36:03.639 --> 00:36:06.760
be to protect yourself too well.

637
00:36:06.800 --> 00:36:09.519
And you know, I always talked about the difference between

638
00:36:09.519 --> 00:36:13.800
either or or bullfanned. And you know, one of the

639
00:36:13.800 --> 00:36:17.840
things that I've talked about before in my interviews with people,

640
00:36:17.880 --> 00:36:18.719
they've talked about it.

641
00:36:18.800 --> 00:36:19.400
I've listened.

642
00:36:19.800 --> 00:36:24.039
But you know, women who have reached their forties or fifties,

643
00:36:25.559 --> 00:36:28.679
they have been the mother, they've been the homemaker. They've

644
00:36:28.800 --> 00:36:32.000
just enjoyed that, and all of a sudden, guess what,

645
00:36:32.199 --> 00:36:33.280
the kids are gone.

646
00:36:34.119 --> 00:36:34.280
And.

647
00:36:36.360 --> 00:36:39.639
Probably eighty percent of that focus that they had with

648
00:36:39.760 --> 00:36:43.320
their kids is no longer there, and now what do

649
00:36:43.440 --> 00:36:46.039
they do? Have You found that as you work with women,

650
00:36:46.119 --> 00:36:49.519
you find women in that situation where all of a

651
00:36:49.519 --> 00:36:54.760
sudden they're they're experiencing some real trouble because all of

652
00:36:54.800 --> 00:36:57.760
a sudden, their kids are gone, and that whole focus

653
00:36:57.840 --> 00:37:00.159
of what you would call the feminism, the homemaking and

654
00:37:00.199 --> 00:37:03.639
so forth, there isn't as much opportunity there.

655
00:37:03.920 --> 00:37:06.800
And now, as you say, they need to find things

656
00:37:06.840 --> 00:37:10.239
to do so that they don't get literally bored, right.

657
00:37:10.119 --> 00:37:11.760
And because it might not be a thing where like

658
00:37:11.800 --> 00:37:13.519
oh no, I'm out on my own, but it could

659
00:37:13.559 --> 00:37:15.880
just be like oh wait now, like what I was

660
00:37:15.960 --> 00:37:19.400
pouring my heart and soul and time into, Like I

661
00:37:19.400 --> 00:37:21.800
don't have that anymore, and I don't necessarily have hobbies,

662
00:37:21.960 --> 00:37:22.960
Like what do I do?

663
00:37:23.079 --> 00:37:26.119
Right? And I will say, like if if a woman

664
00:37:26.239 --> 00:37:26.639
is not.

665
00:37:27.559 --> 00:37:31.000
You know, feeling full emotionally and all of that kind

666
00:37:31.039 --> 00:37:33.880
of stuff, not that you know it's it's she's in

667
00:37:34.000 --> 00:37:37.159
charge of herself, but like a woman's energy is felt.

668
00:37:37.239 --> 00:37:38.639
And so I think, like a.

669
00:37:39.119 --> 00:37:42.440
In a healthy relationship, if that woman's feeling unfulfilled, even

670
00:37:42.480 --> 00:37:45.159
if it's for her own purpose and stuff like that,

671
00:37:45.239 --> 00:37:47.920
like that's that is going to be have a ripple

672
00:37:47.920 --> 00:37:50.039
effect into the family and all of that. And so

673
00:37:50.119 --> 00:37:53.159
I think, And I've worked with a few women who

674
00:37:53.199 --> 00:37:56.000
are you know, in their fifties, sixties, that sort of

675
00:37:56.039 --> 00:37:58.039
thing a bit older than me, which is is so

676
00:37:58.199 --> 00:38:00.199
cool and like such a special thing for me to

677
00:38:00.239 --> 00:38:02.760
like give advice to somebody that I would likely go

678
00:38:02.840 --> 00:38:07.440
to for advice, but worked with women who you know,

679
00:38:07.639 --> 00:38:09.719
might be a little bit younger than my mom and

680
00:38:09.760 --> 00:38:13.639
who are like, ugh, I didn't like I never really

681
00:38:14.119 --> 00:38:16.400
was able to explore this kind of stuff or be

682
00:38:16.599 --> 00:38:21.280
as like unapologetically me and really like own my feminine

683
00:38:21.280 --> 00:38:23.159
power like growing up and stuff like that. And so

684
00:38:23.920 --> 00:38:27.599
I've I've had women work with me in coaching context,

685
00:38:27.960 --> 00:38:31.000
do programs with me and stuff like that, who dive

686
00:38:31.039 --> 00:38:34.159
into this journey as like the empty nester right or

687
00:38:34.199 --> 00:38:37.480
like when their kids are in college and stuff like that,

688
00:38:37.639 --> 00:38:41.000
and they have chosen to really like go on that

689
00:38:41.079 --> 00:38:44.559
personal growth journey, in that embodiment journey for themselves and

690
00:38:44.599 --> 00:38:48.159
find so much fulfillment from it and just like it

691
00:38:48.320 --> 00:38:53.000
like like lights this new kind of fire in them,

692
00:38:53.000 --> 00:38:55.800
which is really really cool to see. But I do

693
00:38:55.840 --> 00:38:58.000
think it is something where it's like, okay, like in

694
00:38:58.079 --> 00:39:01.199
this now, in this chapter, in this season of your life,

695
00:39:01.599 --> 00:39:05.880
like what do you Okay, You've got a whole bunch

696
00:39:06.000 --> 00:39:08.800
of time and energy to work with, Like what sounds

697
00:39:09.280 --> 00:39:12.920
exciting to you, what feels exciting, Let's okay, then let's

698
00:39:13.039 --> 00:39:14.000
let's explore it.

699
00:39:14.119 --> 00:39:16.119
Let's let's see what that looks like.

700
00:39:17.119 --> 00:39:21.960
So in a brief amount of time, how on earth

701
00:39:21.960 --> 00:39:26.199
do you help a woman who is so focused on

702
00:39:26.280 --> 00:39:30.199
that masculine energy, how do you help them to move

703
00:39:30.960 --> 00:39:35.360
and open up that feminine side and not as well

704
00:39:35.440 --> 00:39:38.239
diminish the masculine a little bit and get it more

705
00:39:38.320 --> 00:39:41.760
into a balance the bull and rather than the either.

706
00:39:41.639 --> 00:39:43.840
Or yeah, yeah, absolutely.

707
00:39:44.000 --> 00:39:48.719
So I like to start small, like little, like baby

708
00:39:48.760 --> 00:39:52.199
steps of that. And I remember when I was first

709
00:39:52.239 --> 00:39:54.800
starting in that journey myself, even just with my personal

710
00:39:54.840 --> 00:39:57.440
growth and stuff. I remember like when I started meditating

711
00:39:57.519 --> 00:40:00.440
or you know, sitting in silence, because that was so

712
00:40:00.519 --> 00:40:02.719
hard for me. I would check my I would set

713
00:40:02.719 --> 00:40:06.039
a timer on my phone, close my eyes and I'd

714
00:40:06.079 --> 00:40:07.559
be like, okay, I set it for five minutes or

715
00:40:07.599 --> 00:40:09.920
three minutes or whatever it was, and I'd be like,

716
00:40:10.719 --> 00:40:12.960
I must have something's wrong, something must be wrong. And

717
00:40:13.000 --> 00:40:14.639
I open my eyes to check and I'm like, oh,

718
00:40:14.679 --> 00:40:18.639
I've gone ninety seconds, right, Like wow, that's That's where

719
00:40:18.639 --> 00:40:20.960
I'm at. I can't even sit longer than ninety seconds.

720
00:40:21.360 --> 00:40:24.679
And so in the beginning of this journey, we start small.

721
00:40:24.719 --> 00:40:26.639
And so there's a few things. So if we think

722
00:40:26.679 --> 00:40:31.239
about masculine energy is output energy, penetrative energy, it's more

723
00:40:31.320 --> 00:40:35.840
the thinking, the action, like decisiveness, all of that like

724
00:40:35.960 --> 00:40:39.880
again that linear output energy, whereas feminine energy is more

725
00:40:40.000 --> 00:40:44.880
our being, our emotions, more intuitive, more about the feelings,

726
00:40:45.280 --> 00:40:48.239
is more about receiving. And so what I like to

727
00:40:48.280 --> 00:40:50.079
do a few things I like to do with women

728
00:40:50.280 --> 00:40:54.159
is let's say, like set a five minute timer and

729
00:40:54.920 --> 00:40:58.119
go sit outside on your front lawn and just sit

730
00:40:58.199 --> 00:41:02.079
there on the ground, close your eyes, and for five minutes,

731
00:41:02.119 --> 00:41:05.320
I just want you to tap into your sensory experiences.

732
00:41:05.599 --> 00:41:09.559
Feminine energy is also about sensuality, which isn't just you know,

733
00:41:09.719 --> 00:41:13.440
sexual in nature, but sensuality as in being connected to

734
00:41:13.719 --> 00:41:16.400
your senses right and very very present in the moment.

735
00:41:16.480 --> 00:41:21.559
So go sit outside for five minutes and notice how

736
00:41:21.559 --> 00:41:22.639
many things you can hear?

737
00:41:22.920 --> 00:41:25.039
Like how many different kinds of birds can you hear?

738
00:41:25.199 --> 00:41:28.360
Making noise? Is the like are the leaves rustling in

739
00:41:28.400 --> 00:41:29.559
the wind? That sort of thing?

740
00:41:29.679 --> 00:41:32.039
Is a car driving by and neighbor taking a walk?

741
00:41:32.119 --> 00:41:32.960
Like what can you hear?

742
00:41:33.480 --> 00:41:33.760
Then?

743
00:41:33.800 --> 00:41:36.440
Like what can you smell? Can you smell the grass?

744
00:41:36.480 --> 00:41:38.519
Can you smell frap flowers around you? All of that?

745
00:41:38.840 --> 00:41:42.800
How does it feel? Is the grass beneath you scratchy?

746
00:41:42.960 --> 00:41:45.559
Is the ground hard? Is there a rock under that

747
00:41:45.679 --> 00:41:46.719
side of your hip?

748
00:41:46.800 --> 00:41:49.320
Or something like that, right, do you is there a

749
00:41:49.360 --> 00:41:51.239
breeze that you can feel on your skin, like is

750
00:41:51.280 --> 00:41:54.039
the sun shining on you? So just really tuning into

751
00:41:54.079 --> 00:41:57.239
that sensory experience for a couple of minutes out of time.

752
00:41:57.280 --> 00:42:00.079
So that's one of the really simple things. Another thing

753
00:42:00.119 --> 00:42:03.679
I love to encourage women to do, especially my like

754
00:42:04.199 --> 00:42:07.440
hyper independent. I don't need anyone's help. I am a

755
00:42:07.519 --> 00:42:09.679
boss babe, can do all the things myself. Kind of

756
00:42:09.719 --> 00:42:16.559
woman is to be open to receive help support, like

757
00:42:16.920 --> 00:42:20.320
even not even just help, but just to receive even

758
00:42:20.400 --> 00:42:23.400
when you don't need it. Because that's that's the difference,

759
00:42:23.480 --> 00:42:25.639
right Because I find and I used to be like

760
00:42:25.679 --> 00:42:28.320
this too, could do every single thing myself, and I

761
00:42:28.320 --> 00:42:30.920
know a lot of women can relate. But I would

762
00:42:30.920 --> 00:42:33.239
ask for help once I was already well past my

763
00:42:33.280 --> 00:42:37.039
breaking point, like I'm in breakdown, like crying, having a meltdown,

764
00:42:37.079 --> 00:42:39.679
and then I'll ask someone for help because I physically

765
00:42:39.760 --> 00:42:43.800
and mentally can't actually do it myself anymore. But doesn't

766
00:42:43.840 --> 00:42:45.599
it make a little bit more sense to maybe ask

767
00:42:45.639 --> 00:42:48.159
for some support before you get to that moment, right

768
00:42:48.519 --> 00:42:53.159
before you're forced into it. And So another little thing

769
00:42:53.360 --> 00:42:56.760
is like I said, just being open to receive, right,

770
00:42:56.840 --> 00:43:00.760
And so this can look as simple as and I

771
00:43:00.880 --> 00:43:05.119
use this example all the time. But like I go,

772
00:43:05.280 --> 00:43:07.199
there's a store around the corner from me that where

773
00:43:07.199 --> 00:43:09.239
I get my spring water filled up in those big

774
00:43:09.320 --> 00:43:11.400
huge jugs that are super heavy and stuff like that.

775
00:43:11.480 --> 00:43:15.199
And so when I get those filled up, and the employee,

776
00:43:15.239 --> 00:43:17.280
not every single time, but will often ask because I'm

777
00:43:17.360 --> 00:43:19.519
usually coming in with a few of those, hey would

778
00:43:19.519 --> 00:43:21.639
you like some help getting those out to your car?

779
00:43:22.000 --> 00:43:23.760
And they have carts and stuff like that, but if

780
00:43:23.960 --> 00:43:27.000
I'm being asked that, I will generally, and again this

781
00:43:27.119 --> 00:43:29.079
is an employee that works there, right, so there's no

782
00:43:29.159 --> 00:43:32.320
I'm not really concerned about like weird energy or if

783
00:43:32.360 --> 00:43:35.079
I'm you know, like anything like that. If it's a

784
00:43:35.119 --> 00:43:37.159
man and stuff, and I'll say, you know what, that

785
00:43:37.199 --> 00:43:39.000
would be amazing, thank you so much.

786
00:43:39.679 --> 00:43:43.599
Can I do that myself? Absolutely? Have I done it myself?

787
00:43:43.880 --> 00:43:44.559
Yes I have.

788
00:43:45.440 --> 00:43:48.760
Would it be nice and make my life feel a

789
00:43:48.800 --> 00:43:53.559
little softer and easier if someone helped me carry these heavy.

790
00:43:53.440 --> 00:43:55.719
Water jugs out to my car? Yes, right?

791
00:43:55.760 --> 00:44:00.000
So being open to receive, because something else I've noticed

792
00:44:00.079 --> 00:44:03.559
with women like this is it's they're very blocked off

793
00:44:03.599 --> 00:44:09.840
to receiving, especially to receiving from men, and often see

794
00:44:09.880 --> 00:44:13.440
that receiving as oh, well, if I accept this, then

795
00:44:13.639 --> 00:44:16.000
I do I owe you something like uh do I

796
00:44:16.039 --> 00:44:18.559
owe you? And it can even we can even get

797
00:44:18.679 --> 00:44:22.360
so like boil it down so much to even compliments. Right,

798
00:44:22.639 --> 00:44:26.199
And again I want women to like use discernment. If

799
00:44:26.280 --> 00:44:28.159
a man is offering and stuff like that, you want

800
00:44:28.159 --> 00:44:30.719
to use your judgment because there could be an expectation

801
00:44:30.840 --> 00:44:32.840
or like the energy might be off and stuff like that.

802
00:44:33.159 --> 00:44:36.159
But even if like notice with your friends or like.

803
00:44:36.480 --> 00:44:39.079
Someone out when you're the grocery shopping or something, if

804
00:44:39.119 --> 00:44:42.039
someone comments you, oh my gosh, like I love your outfit, right,

805
00:44:42.519 --> 00:44:45.159
instead of or like oh you're so oh my gosh,

806
00:44:45.159 --> 00:44:48.199
you're so funny, you're so pretty, whatever it is instead

807
00:44:48.440 --> 00:44:50.320
is your knee jerk reaction to.

808
00:44:50.840 --> 00:44:53.360
Say, oh no, no, no, no, no, like no, oh no,

809
00:44:53.480 --> 00:44:54.360
you are right to.

810
00:44:54.440 --> 00:44:58.199
Just like like ping pong it right back at them

811
00:44:58.280 --> 00:45:00.599
or deflect it or not even hear it, not even

812
00:45:00.639 --> 00:45:05.559
receive it, or can you actually sit there and receive

813
00:45:05.800 --> 00:45:09.199
that compliment? Right, Because if you have trouble just receiving

814
00:45:09.239 --> 00:45:12.800
somebody's kind words, it's gonna be a lot harder to

815
00:45:12.920 --> 00:45:16.719
receive somebody's actions. And so if a lot of these

816
00:45:16.719 --> 00:45:19.719
women are like I just want a man who's takes

817
00:45:19.840 --> 00:45:23.480
action and is a provider and like protector and masculine.

818
00:45:23.559 --> 00:45:25.440
Right, Masculine men like to take action.

819
00:45:25.559 --> 00:45:29.440
They like to like have servant hearts and stuff like that, right,

820
00:45:29.440 --> 00:45:33.039
they like to pour into and like be supportive and stuff.

821
00:45:33.079 --> 00:45:36.639
And so if you're not able to receive somebody's words

822
00:45:36.679 --> 00:45:39.000
to you, it's gonna be a lot harder to receive

823
00:45:39.039 --> 00:45:41.639
someone's actions, and you're not going to feel worthy of

824
00:45:41.679 --> 00:45:44.000
the actions and everything. So that's even another one of

825
00:45:44.000 --> 00:45:48.719
those tiny, tiny ways to like like release that like

826
00:45:49.480 --> 00:45:51.920
masculine kind of grip on things and be more in

827
00:45:51.960 --> 00:45:55.199
your feminine is just by way of receiving in those

828
00:45:55.280 --> 00:45:56.159
those little moments.

829
00:45:56.639 --> 00:45:58.559
Okay, great, and we've run out of time.

830
00:45:59.039 --> 00:46:02.960
Okay, so I think we could do another one here

831
00:46:03.119 --> 00:46:07.119
and have a whole discussion, so as we And how

832
00:46:07.119 --> 00:46:10.239
do people find you, and particularly how do they find

833
00:46:10.239 --> 00:46:12.559
your podcast, because I'm sure this is what you talk

834
00:46:12.639 --> 00:46:13.719
about on your podcast.

835
00:46:13.800 --> 00:46:15.440
Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

836
00:46:15.480 --> 00:46:20.280
So you can find me at Laurensalon dot com. You

837
00:46:20.320 --> 00:46:23.920
can also find me at Lauren Salon on Instagram as

838
00:46:23.960 --> 00:46:26.360
well as TikTok. My last name is spelled s A

839
00:46:26.679 --> 00:46:30.760
l a u N and my podcast is called Amplify

840
00:46:31.039 --> 00:46:34.239
with Lauren, And yes, we talk about all kinds of things,

841
00:46:34.719 --> 00:46:39.960
personal growth, somatics, healing, relationships, dating, all of that fantastic.

842
00:46:40.000 --> 00:46:42.559
And so as we close, what would be that final

843
00:46:42.599 --> 00:46:44.719
message that you want to share with the audience.

844
00:46:45.079 --> 00:46:50.360
Yeah, absolutely, I would say. So I'm all about authenticity

845
00:46:50.519 --> 00:46:55.199
and magnetism, and so I would say the most magnetic

846
00:46:55.320 --> 00:46:59.880
thing that you can do is being unapologetically yourself. So

847
00:47:00.079 --> 00:47:04.599
being your most authentic self. And when you stop trying

848
00:47:04.639 --> 00:47:07.760
to be what you think everybody else wants you to be,

849
00:47:08.000 --> 00:47:11.320
right like fitting into what everyone else thinks you should

850
00:47:11.360 --> 00:47:13.360
do and be what the world wants. When you stop

851
00:47:13.480 --> 00:47:18.159
doing that, you become very very irresistible to the people

852
00:47:18.280 --> 00:47:21.639
and the opportunities that are meant to you. So if

853
00:47:21.639 --> 00:47:25.440
you want to be the most magnetic, be your unapologetically

854
00:47:25.519 --> 00:47:26.440
authentic self.

855
00:47:27.159 --> 00:47:27.440
Love it.

856
00:47:27.519 --> 00:47:29.119
Lauren, Thank you so much.

857
00:47:29.440 --> 00:47:30.840
Absolutely, thank you for having me.

858
00:47:31.280 --> 00:47:31.960
It's been great.

859
00:47:32.000 --> 00:47:34.400
And like I say, it always amazes me how quickly

860
00:47:34.480 --> 00:47:38.719
time goes by, I know, and particularly with our discussion here,

861
00:47:38.960 --> 00:47:42.559
It's like there's so many things we didn't even get

862
00:47:42.599 --> 00:47:45.639
to and like I say, i'd love to have you

863
00:47:45.679 --> 00:47:48.119
on the show again and talk even more about some

864
00:47:48.199 --> 00:47:48.880
of those things.

865
00:47:49.159 --> 00:47:52.320
Absolutely, i'd be happy to. I would be happy to

866
00:47:52.639 --> 00:47:54.079
thank you so much for having me.

867
00:47:54.199 --> 00:47:55.719
And folks, thanks for listening.

868
00:47:55.719 --> 00:47:58.199
And I hope you've enjoyed this because I've really enjoyed

869
00:47:58.239 --> 00:48:01.000
this one, so I hope you have to and look

870
00:48:01.039 --> 00:48:02.760
forward to having you join us again soon.

871
00:48:03.079 --> 00:48:06.320
This is doctor Doug Pain, no mistake,