Aug. 11, 2025

Navigating Life’s Transitions with FROGS: Finding Strength Through Change

Navigating Life’s Transitions with FROGS: Finding Strength Through Change

Brenda K. Reynolds joins Dr. Doug to share her powerful journey from personal crisis to personal growth, introducing her FROGS framework for navigating change. Discover how to turn “Now what?” into “Why not?” and use life’s challenges as stepping stones to resilience and purpose.
https://www.brendakreynolds.com

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This program is designed to provide general information with regards

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to the subject matters covered. This information is given with

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the understanding that neither the hosts, guests, sponsors, or station

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are engaged in rendering any specific and personal medical, financial,

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legal counseling, professional service, or any advice. You should seek

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the services of competent professionals before applying or trying any

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suggested ideas.

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At the end of the day, it's not about what

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you have or even what you've accomplished. It's about what

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you've done with those accomplishments. It's about who you've lifted up,

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who you've made better. It's about what you've given back.

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Denzel Washington, Welcome to inspire Vision. Our sole purpose is

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to elevate the lives of others and to inspire you

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to do the same.

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Brenda welcome.

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Thank you for having me.

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Oh I'm excited. You know, it's always so interesting how

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people can together. And you know, I was doing an

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interview just the other day talking about synchronicity, and I

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think it's so amazing that you know that works so well,

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and you know, you have such an interesting topic and

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I'm looking forward to talking about it. I'd love for

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you to share with the audience your story, your journey,

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because I know that had a lot to do with

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what you're doing now.

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It really does, really does. I mean I for my career.

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For the most of my career, I've been in a

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training and development leader or organization development consultant. But you know,

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what I was using in my work started to come

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in handy in two thousand and eight when my.

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Life took a side turn.

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It took it went sideway as I found myself unexpectedly divorcing,

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becoming a single mom with two little boys, no guaranteed income,

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no healthcare benefits, and every part of my life needed

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to change.

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And in that moment, I were thinking, I was.

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Really grateful that I had the background and training that

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I did, and wishing that I could share more of

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those messages with others.

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And so ultimately that's what I did.

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And in the two books that I've written, there really

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about helping people through times of change and helping folks

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be more resilient.

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And how does that work for you?

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Oh, I'm being tested right now, you know, doctor Doug.

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I'm being tested. I think along with the rest of

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the world. Right we wake up every morning and say

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that wasn't a dream. Things are really changing. I got

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to read my own books.

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Well, yeah, it's so interesting. You know. We talk about

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and as I say, I just got up an interview

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talking about synchronicity, and one of the points that I

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wanted to make for the folks that were listening is

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that synchronicity doesn't always bring about the good things. Sometimes

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we experience things that we don't consider good. But over

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the years, as we look back, we realized it kind

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of put us on a path. For instance, with your divorce,

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with what happened in two thousand and eight, you know

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that certainly wasn't something you would consider great, but look

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where's put you now?

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One hundred percent.

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I always say I did a ted X talk and

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I talk about navigating transition fog, and what I say

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in that is, you know, we don't see the gift

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of the fog until it's in the rearview mirror, and

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then we look back and go, oh, yeah, I traveled

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through that and I wouldn't want to do it again.

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But I got to some destination that was pretty cool.

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But man, that was a foggy, tricky journey.

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Well, and you've written two books and I know we're

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going to talk about this last book that you've written,

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which I appreciate you have sent me, and so I

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had a chance to skim through it. But what was

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the first book you wrote and what motivated that and

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what's it about?

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That first book was really after years after my divorce,

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when I thought, gee, I wish leaders had this information

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when they're leading themselves and others through times of change,

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the information that I had from my master's degree program

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in organization development. And then it occurred to me, well,

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why don't I make that available to them.

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They don't have to go back and get an advanced degree.

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What if I write a very manageable, easy to read

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book that takes some of those content topics and breaks

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it down for them. So it's called TBD to be Determined,

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Leading with clarity and confidence in uncertain times. And so

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I wrote this right before my youngest son was going

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off the year before he was going off to college,

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because I did want to be that sad, weepy mom

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that was sending him out the door. I wanted him

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to be excited about his next chapter. And it really

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was a time in my life, doctor Doug, where I

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said to myself what are the dreams I haven't fulfilled yet?

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What if I start to pursue one of those so

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that I'm equally excited about the next chapter in my

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life as he goes off to launch his And so

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that's what I did. I wrote the book in twenty

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seventeen and then was invited to do a ted X

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talk on one of the topics in the book, which

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is navigating transition fog.

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All right, and you know we met via LinkedIn and

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that is really a very business side and I know

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that most of your background has been working with businesses.

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But what I have found is I've done a little

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bit of consulting, was that what we talked about in

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business applied so well to life. And so that's where

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I like our focus of the discussion today is, you know,

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as we talk about things, and we can bring up

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what you talk you know, what you wrote in that

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book as well as the other one. But the key

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is is that what we can do in life. And

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I kind of like to reverse it because I think

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ultimately our success in business in a large degree, not always,

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but in a large degree, depends on our success in life. Now,

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there are obviously those who have been extremely successful in

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business and not very successful in life. But the reality

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I think with the majority of the population is if

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they can become successful in their life, and that has

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a lot of innuendos to it, that they can then

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experience a successful and joyful experience in what they're doing

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in business. But I think the most important thing is life.

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They can enjoy life.

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Well.

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I think you make a good good point, which is

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I think we're conditioned in some weird way and I've

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never thought about this until this moment to put it

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this way, But we see life as a subset of

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work instead of work as a subset of life, and

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we forget that the bigger context is life. And when

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I am coaching any executive, we probably spend more of

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our time talking about their life than we do their

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work world. Because they have plenty of people. They can

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talk about their work world with plenty of folks who

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can give them advice.

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But when it.

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Comes to opening up and being real and vulnerable and

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authentic about the impact work has on the rest of

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their life or the price they may be paying in

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the rest of their life, they really need a trusted

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companion to talk about those things with. Because the leadership

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space can be pretty lonely and you have to watch

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what you say to whomever well.

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And you know, it's interesting also, and I've seen this

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happen a lot, where you get people that are in

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management positions and they are the most uncomfortable people to

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work with. And when you look at that and really

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analyze that, you can recognize that that has everything to

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do with who they are and whatever is managing those

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emotions rather than their management style per se.

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To me, being a good leader is mastering your use

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of self. I call it use of self. How do

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you show up in that space and use yourself? And

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to do that, you know you need good self knowledge.

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Better self knowledge means better self management means better leadership.

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And so it's you know, leadership's and inside job. We

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start there. That's my philosophy.

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Anyway, and leadership in life I think becomes the whole key.

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So let's talk about the second book. And it's really

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a work book, which I love how you've done that.

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But talk about the second book and what is that

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about and and what motivated you to write this one?

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Well, you know, I got even further away from my

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life circumstances and I began. I was still working with

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a lot of people to your earlier point who were

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not just wrestling with leadership, but they wanted to talk

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about life, leading their lives.

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And I started to.

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Reflect back, well, it's a very interesting talk about synchronous synchronicities.

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When I was being divorced, my divorce attorney said to me, Brenda,

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whatever you do, do not come in here and start

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telling me about some guy you've met, some prince charming

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that's going to save the day for you until you

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have kissed at least five frogs. Now, doctor Doug, I

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couldn't imagine going on one date, let alone five, So

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that stuck with me, and as I began dating, I

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was counting them.

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Off like frogs, like one, two, three, four, five.

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I'm like, oh, maybe I'll write a book on, you know,

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navigating divorce and dating. And then at the end of

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the fifth frog, I thought, oh, that's gonna be a

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really lame book. Forget that, so I just dropped the

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whole thing. But those frogs stayed in my brain. And

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then fast forward. I was walking by my television one

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day and somebody said, frogs is an acronym for fully

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reliant on God.

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Now in the space that I was in.

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I probably waved my middle finger at the television that day,

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thinking I'm not feeling like God is in my life

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at this moment, but it still.

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Was with me.

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And then I had a dream one night, and I

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had a dream about this frog. And the next day

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I went shopping with a girlfriend in the store just

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chalk full of little knickknacks and chatchkes, and the first

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thing my eyes went to was this ceramic frog that

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was the exact frog.

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I dreamed about the night before. And then two weeks later, I.

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Was going through my office cleaning it out, and I

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had saved an old Christmas card from a client, absolutely

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nothing remarkable about it except that on the front of

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that card was this frog. And it's like I started

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seeing five frogs, you know, and I thought, what is

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with the frogs?

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And I looked to them up.

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I started doing some research to find out just how

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resilient frogs are and that they are symbols of change

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and transformation.

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And as I reflected on my journey.

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I thought, oh, wait a minute, these are kind of

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the stages we go through when any disorienting life or

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work event hits us. And so each of the frogs

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stands for a different stage that we go through on

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the road to getting more and more resilient.

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Well, I love that. As I looked at that, I've

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been really contemplating a lot of things for a while,

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and you know, I haven't written a book yet, but

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I'm trying to. But what fascinated me is as I

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was looking at the frogs and what you wrote for

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each one of them, it just parallels so much. And

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I think what's interesting is everyone comes from a different perspective,

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and yet when you look at the reality of what

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the message is is very similar. I find that fascinating.

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I mean, being here in Thailand, you know, I've loved

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to study Buddhism and then and I happen to be Christian,

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so I'll start with that. But then also as I've

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interviewed a number of people, they've talked about Vetic yoga,

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which is really Hinduism. So I started looking at that,

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and what I found is that the message from each

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of those which are thousands, at least hundreds of not

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thousands of years apart, are very similar.

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It's scient wisdom that comes through all across the world,

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you know, and we just have different messengers who package

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it differently, and someone who needs to hear it presented

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this way, and somebody who needs to hear it presented

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in frog form, and you know, somebody who comes from

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it academically, and someone who comes from it, you know,

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through religious religion. And so I think, yeah, we're all

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downloaded with some of these messages were supposed to be

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sharing simultaneously.

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Well, let's talk about your philosophy, let's talk about let's

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talk about what you personally went through or what you've

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worked with clients, and you've seen what they've gone through.

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But let's talk about frogs.

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Oh, frogs.

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I've really never thought so much about frogs until I

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started writing this, And really, to be honest with you,

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there's an entire book I will write, and I've started

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years ago. I started writing a full blown book on

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this topic, and it's not quite ready yet. I'm still

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not sure exactly where it goes. So in the meantime,

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I thought, let me put out a guided journal on

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the topic to see if it sticks, to see if

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the acronym makes sense to people.

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And that's how the journal really came to be. And

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it's been fascinating since I put it out to.

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Hear the really unique ways people are using it, in

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ways that I could never have even imagined. And so

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the frogs is, you know, the F stage is when

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something happens whether we whether we choose it, or it's

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imposed on us. You know, my life situation was imposed

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on me. But again you have to surrender to that.

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Here it is, here we go, I'm about to go

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on a journey. And in the F stage, it feels

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like everything's falling apart. At a minimum, you're in a

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fork in the road and you're trying to make a

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lot of decisions, and there are a lot of other

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F words that show up. We freak out, we may

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get frustrated. We're in our raw feelings. It's a highly

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emotional state and we want to honor that because the

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emotions are real, and if we don't, they get stuffed down.

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And even when I relate this model to what happens

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in organizational life when leaders navigate change, when they announce

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a big change, they often don't really want to hear

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everybody's feelings. They just want to pretend they don't exist

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and get on with the change. But research shows if

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you don't let people find a healthy way to process

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those emotions. As human beings, they get stuck deep in,

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they get stuffed into the culture, and they will kind

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of raise their rear their heads in very strange ways

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and inopportune times because there's a distrust that get baked

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gets baked into the culture.

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Well, I know, it's interesting as to talk about freaking out.

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You know. One of the things I've looked at is

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I've interviewed different people that have gone through different processes

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of transformation. What I find is there's always some situation

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that has occurred in their life that causes that freaking out.

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And I think that you know, you look at that,

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you look what you went through. I've certainly gone through

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similar things, and you realize that it's only that situation

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that finally causes us to be motivated to start to

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do something about our lives. It suddenly gives us realization that,

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you know what, this is not the life that I want.

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It isn't It had me do a lot of things,

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It had me say, you know, to be honest, I

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was living in my dream home, a home I never

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could have imagined living in, and in that moment, that

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home meant nothing to me, and I said to myself

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in this next chapter of life, it's really like I

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will never get attached to material items again, and it's

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really more about I want to lead a simple life,

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a very simple life. And so that put me, you know,

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on that trajectory. It put my focus squarely on on

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my only prayer and goal was let me raise two

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amazing human beings. That matters to me more than what

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someone's going to pay me every year to do the

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work that I do. It put me in a place

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of saying what's really important to me now? And ultimately

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it led me down a path where I could say, well,

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what are the dreams I haven't fulfilled?

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And I guarantee you I don't think I would have

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written a book. I don't think I.

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Would have hit the speaking circuit or done a ten

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X talk if it hadn't been for that f moment

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in my life.

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Well, and that moves you into what you were just

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talking about, which is the R which is reflecting and responsible.

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And you know, I love that because you know, if

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as we freak out, if we can really take the

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time and have the ability to start to reflect as

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you did, and honestly, you know, step outside of yourself,

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look at your life and go, okay, what would I

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want you to think about that? That becomes that's the thing.

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But I love the word responsibility too, because I think

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so many times people find themselves in evictim olty and

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they don't even know that they're there, but all of

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a sudden, they do not take responsibility for what's going

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on in their lives. And obviously there are things such

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as you talked about, you know, the divorce. It was

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something that just happened and probably not you know whatever.

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But things happen in our lives that we can say,

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you know what, I'm not responsible for that. But what

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we are responsible for is how we respond.

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Absolutely, and you know that responsibility.

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And that reflection goes two directions.

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So we look to the past and say, what was

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my part in being here? What did I contribute to

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this showing up? Because I think we have to start

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with ourselves, and then we say, okay, now what's my part?

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What is my You know, I break the word responsibility

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out into the two words I always have the ability

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to choose my response.

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It's my response.

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Ability, and that's where your power comes from. Remembering that

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no matter what happens, you get to choose your response,

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and you can I had a mentor who once said

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to me, you can choose to change or influence a situation.

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So that's option one. Option two is you can accept

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it even temporarily, or the third is you have to

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get out of it. And if you can just remember

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that no matter what happens to you in life, you

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always have those three choices. You feel less like a

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victim because you get to pick what you're.

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Going to do well. And as you've worked with and

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again I assume you don't do a lot of personal coaching.

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It sounds like you do more corporate and business type

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of stuff. But even as you're working with those leaders

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that you're working with, you find oftentimes they fall into

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that victimhood.

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It's easy to It's either that or you know, no

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leader feels like they're really in charge because even if

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you're at the tippity top of the organization as a CEO,

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you're still responding to the stakeholders, the shareholders, Wall Street,

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the board, so no one really sees the things that

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are happening is fully theirs, and so in that way,

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it can feel like, yeah, they're not taking the full

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responsibility or you can blame your employees because they're just

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not getting on board with the change, or they're just

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being so ungrateful.

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But I have a.

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Background in organization dynamics, so I understand all of those invisible.

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Forces that are happening in the organization.

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To set it up that way and try to shine

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some light on that for people so they can see

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from where they sit in the organization, what they're part

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in the situation is, and what choices they have for

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how they're going to show up. But I do want

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to say this too, doctor Doug. It is fascinating to me.

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And again this is where I just surrender to the universe.

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I've always worked worked with businesses and leaders and corporations,

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but I am noticing in the past year more and

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more folks are coming to me who want to work with.

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Me personally in personal life.

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And I think some of that is because the journal

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the journal, it's not real corporate y. I mean, you

385
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can use it that way if you're doing a corporate situation,

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but it really just I think it really just speaks

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to anybody, and so I'm just paying attention they're coming

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and I actually have three different women who are asking

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me for personal coaching that I'm working on proposals for

390
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this week.

391
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That's great. And as you look at that from a

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standpoint of this concept of victimhood, how would you help people,

393
00:20:45.799 --> 00:20:48.160
let's get to the personal level rather than the business.

394
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How would you help people to begin to understand that?

395
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And I love how you use the word, you know,

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responsibility and responsible. How can you help them to understand

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and that whatever is happening, they have that responsibility. They

398
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cannot blame someone else or what they're experiencing in life.

399
00:21:09.680 --> 00:21:12.799
They may say, all right, this event happened, but they

400
00:21:12.799 --> 00:21:17.599
can only blame themselves and take responsibility for their response,

401
00:21:17.799 --> 00:21:21.200
for their emotions, and for their behavior based on their emotions.

402
00:21:21.680 --> 00:21:23.319
Yeah, I think the power is in you know.

403
00:21:23.359 --> 00:21:25.319
I think the muscle we need to build and we're

404
00:21:25.319 --> 00:21:28.960
in that R stages is learning how to reframe things.

405
00:21:29.599 --> 00:21:32.480
So if we see this as this thing that happened

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to me that I didn't deserve.

407
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And I have a quote in here that I'm going

408
00:21:37.599 --> 00:21:42.039
to probably misquote, but I love it. It's like saying

409
00:21:42.559 --> 00:21:45.759
I'm because you know you're wearing red, but you're saying

410
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because I'm a good person, bad things shouldn't happen to me.

411
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The bull doesn't care. You know, if you're out here

412
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expecting the world to treat you fairly because you're good,

413
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it's like expecting the bull not to charge because you're

414
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a vegetarian. Right, it's going to happen to us. We

415
00:22:03.599 --> 00:22:06.599
cannot get away from things happening to.

416
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Us that don't feel fair. So I think the first

417
00:22:09.599 --> 00:22:12.440
step is accepting that life is not fair.

418
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No one said it was going to be. No one

419
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said it was going to be. So what do you

420
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do with your unfair situation?

421
00:22:19.200 --> 00:22:19.759
Is the question?

422
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Yeah, And you know, it's interesting the Buddha talks about

423
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that a lot, which I'm fascinated by. That philosophy that

424
00:22:26.759 --> 00:22:32.720
he has is this concept of everyone experiences suffering. His

425
00:22:32.839 --> 00:22:35.400
whole model was to help people to get to the

426
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point where, yeah, life happens, but they don't have to suffer.

427
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And bring the choices that Buddha says, yes, suffering is

428
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a choice. That's not the choice you want to make.

429
00:22:47.519 --> 00:22:50.640
That's right. So as you talk about that, the reality

430
00:22:50.880 --> 00:22:54.880
is that we can ultimately get to the point where

431
00:22:55.240 --> 00:22:59.039
life happens, but we don't let it affect us negatively.

432
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We don't allow it to cause us to suffer extremely

433
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but rather just understand what's going on, maybe understand that

434
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it's part of synchronicity that we don't understand yet, but

435
00:23:11.119 --> 00:23:13.920
ultimately as we work through it, and that goes through

436
00:23:14.400 --> 00:23:17.000
your next phase. And so i'll have you talk about

437
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that as far as once we do the reflecting, once

438
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we take that responsibility, then we go into the old

439
00:23:23.960 --> 00:23:24.960
what does that stand for?

440
00:23:25.480 --> 00:23:27.400
And it's funny because I think you're leading into it

441
00:23:27.440 --> 00:23:30.759
with that comment about Buddhism right. Part of the overcoming

442
00:23:30.799 --> 00:23:34.599
the obstacles, which is what O stands for, is one

443
00:23:34.599 --> 00:23:37.720
of the first things is surrendering to the situation.

444
00:23:38.440 --> 00:23:38.839
Two.

445
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Buddhism talks about this concept also in permanence, which I love.

446
00:23:44.200 --> 00:23:46.240
It reminds us that, oh.

447
00:23:46.079 --> 00:23:48.759
You're having a great day, well just wait, that's going

448
00:23:48.799 --> 00:23:51.559
to change, right, the next day may not be so great.

449
00:23:51.720 --> 00:23:53.880
Oh you're having a bad day, Well don't worry. It's

450
00:23:53.880 --> 00:23:55.680
going to change and you'll have a good day.

451
00:23:56.079 --> 00:23:59.039
So good and bad is going to we're going to

452
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flip flop between them because we're always in a state

453
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of impermanence. So I think when we're having a tough time,

454
00:24:04.839 --> 00:24:07.680
if we remind ourselves. This isn't going to be here

455
00:24:08.039 --> 00:24:12.799
like this forever. But we also appreciate then the really

456
00:24:12.960 --> 00:24:16.200
good times because we know they're not going to last

457
00:24:16.240 --> 00:24:19.240
forever either. There's going to be a bump ahead somewhere,

458
00:24:19.720 --> 00:24:22.839
and then we get to live in gratitude with what's

459
00:24:22.920 --> 00:24:26.680
right in front of us. And I think the overcoming

460
00:24:26.720 --> 00:24:31.240
obstacles is, you know, some of those obstacles are mindset obstacles.

461
00:24:32.039 --> 00:24:35.680
Some of them are just keeping ourselves from being paralyzed

462
00:24:36.200 --> 00:24:41.799
and making even the smallest inroad, the smallest step towards something.

463
00:24:41.960 --> 00:24:44.720
You know, I remember back in my divorce days, just

464
00:24:45.000 --> 00:24:50.000
getting out of bed felt like a huge win. Just

465
00:24:50.119 --> 00:24:53.200
getting showered, or just getting two kids off to the

466
00:24:53.240 --> 00:24:57.839
school bus. Those are all winds, And to this day,

467
00:24:57.920 --> 00:25:00.839
it just happened two weeks ago. I thought, Man, I

468
00:25:00.839 --> 00:25:02.720
feel really busy right now, But I don't know how

469
00:25:02.759 --> 00:25:05.119
productive I'm being. You know, a lot of the work

470
00:25:05.160 --> 00:25:08.200
I'm doing isn't really even paying paid work, you know

471
00:25:08.240 --> 00:25:10.799
what am I doing? But I know I'm doing important

472
00:25:10.799 --> 00:25:13.079
stuff on some level. So I actually took a piece

473
00:25:13.079 --> 00:25:15.799
of paper and I started writing down, I'm looking over

474
00:25:15.839 --> 00:25:18.759
here because it's here somewhere and I started writing down

475
00:25:18.799 --> 00:25:20.720
the things I had been working on that week, and

476
00:25:20.799 --> 00:25:23.960
many of them were foundational things like updating my website

477
00:25:24.000 --> 00:25:27.440
and updating my bio and making a few phone calls,

478
00:25:27.559 --> 00:25:31.279
and they were really important things, but they didn't feel

479
00:25:31.279 --> 00:25:35.359
like they were instantly creating an outcome. But I had

480
00:25:35.400 --> 00:25:40.240
to in that moment remind myself that this is headway,

481
00:25:40.599 --> 00:25:42.079
This is important stuff.

482
00:25:42.519 --> 00:25:45.319
I think we lose track of it. We only count

483
00:25:45.319 --> 00:25:46.200
the big things.

484
00:25:46.559 --> 00:25:49.480
Yes, And I love how you talk about mindset and

485
00:25:49.519 --> 00:25:53.680
how you know, we've grown up, particularly in the US

486
00:25:53.839 --> 00:25:58.640
culture of wanting things now, and you know, we we

487
00:25:58.759 --> 00:26:03.400
have lost that to understand the value of patients and

488
00:26:03.559 --> 00:26:06.480
understanding that, you know what, we have to do those

489
00:26:06.599 --> 00:26:10.720
foundational things first before we can expect the results. But

490
00:26:10.839 --> 00:26:13.680
let's talk about mindset a little bit, because I think

491
00:26:13.720 --> 00:26:16.839
that's really important. As you talk about mindset, what are

492
00:26:16.880 --> 00:26:19.839
you really talking about and what is what is? What

493
00:26:19.880 --> 00:26:23.000
are those subconscious things that can affect our mindset? And

494
00:26:23.039 --> 00:26:24.880
how do we get to the point where we are

495
00:26:24.960 --> 00:26:29.000
really in control of our mindset as you know, totally

496
00:26:29.039 --> 00:26:32.480
talks about in control of managing our ego and those

497
00:26:32.519 --> 00:26:36.359
type of things which I think becomes extremely important if

498
00:26:36.400 --> 00:26:39.759
we want to move into the next step of moving forward.

499
00:26:40.279 --> 00:26:43.279
Yeah, I think it's really taking You know, I have

500
00:26:43.319 --> 00:26:45.240
a mentor who used to call that voice in our

501
00:26:45.319 --> 00:26:48.079
heads his yama yama, and he said, you know, your

502
00:26:48.160 --> 00:26:51.960
yama yama, which is your ego voice, is always there

503
00:26:52.599 --> 00:26:55.799
for most of us. And so it isn't about getting

504
00:26:55.880 --> 00:26:58.079
rid of it, but it is about learning to turn

505
00:26:58.079 --> 00:27:02.119
the volume down on it, because that creates a negative mindset,

506
00:27:02.400 --> 00:27:05.680
and that voice is usually talking to us worse than

507
00:27:05.720 --> 00:27:08.440
we would ever talk to a friend of ours. It

508
00:27:08.480 --> 00:27:11.720
says really terrible things to us, and so we've got

509
00:27:11.720 --> 00:27:13.839
to turn it down because it's going to tell you

510
00:27:14.480 --> 00:27:17.319
this is terrible and this thing that's happening to you

511
00:27:17.519 --> 00:27:21.559
is devastating. Well what if it isn't you know, what

512
00:27:21.799 --> 00:27:24.319
if that thing is here to serve us in some

513
00:27:24.440 --> 00:27:27.480
strange way, but we just can't see what it.

514
00:27:27.440 --> 00:27:28.319
Is just yet.

515
00:27:28.720 --> 00:27:31.319
And so part of the obstacles we need to overcome

516
00:27:31.400 --> 00:27:33.200
is how we're even looking at the situation.

517
00:27:33.920 --> 00:27:36.680
And if we reframe.

518
00:27:36.160 --> 00:27:40.799
What looks like a challenge as something more favorable. Not

519
00:27:40.839 --> 00:27:43.960
to say we get real Pollyanna, but we do say,

520
00:27:44.119 --> 00:27:47.720
what if we get curious, what if this is here

521
00:27:47.759 --> 00:27:49.200
to serve me somehow.

522
00:27:49.240 --> 00:27:51.519
What if this is here to teach me something?

523
00:27:52.119 --> 00:27:56.960
What if this is an opportunity disguised as a problem,

524
00:27:57.519 --> 00:28:02.359
And when we can reframe a rainy day as an

525
00:28:02.400 --> 00:28:06.079
opportunity to get some home projects done. Or when I

526
00:28:06.160 --> 00:28:09.359
was going through my divorce and we moved and my

527
00:28:09.799 --> 00:28:12.759
children were in a new neighborhoodhere I didn't really know anyone.

528
00:28:12.920 --> 00:28:15.799
I ended up taking a job back inside Corporate America

529
00:28:15.920 --> 00:28:18.720
for four years just to pay the bills, and I

530
00:28:18.759 --> 00:28:21.319
had this long, hour long commute, and I for the

531
00:28:21.359 --> 00:28:25.119
first three months I cried every day there and.

532
00:28:25.079 --> 00:28:27.400
Back because I didn't want to do this commute.

533
00:28:27.799 --> 00:28:32.079
And one day a friend said to me on the telephone, Hey, Brenda,

534
00:28:32.200 --> 00:28:33.039
this isn't forever.

535
00:28:33.680 --> 00:28:37.599
This is just a temporary bridge to what's next.

536
00:28:37.799 --> 00:28:41.359
And I was like, Oh, something about it that day

537
00:28:41.480 --> 00:28:44.000
was what I needed to hear, And all of a sudden,

538
00:28:44.000 --> 00:28:47.039
I was able to reframe my commute as what a

539
00:28:47.079 --> 00:28:49.359
gift I have been a whole hour two hours a

540
00:28:49.480 --> 00:28:52.480
day where I can stay in touch with family, make

541
00:28:52.559 --> 00:28:57.599
phone calls to friends, listen to a radio program, a

542
00:28:57.640 --> 00:29:02.920
book on tape. And I went so far as to say,

543
00:29:03.599 --> 00:29:06.279
I want to make the most of this commute. I

544
00:29:06.359 --> 00:29:09.839
sold my car and I bought a pre owned sports car,

545
00:29:10.240 --> 00:29:12.480
and I'm like, I'm going to love this commute in

546
00:29:12.720 --> 00:29:15.079
every way. I'm going to take advantage of the time.

547
00:29:15.160 --> 00:29:17.400
I'm going to love my vehicle. I'm going to feel

548
00:29:17.400 --> 00:29:20.000
like I'm so lucky I get to drive this thing

549
00:29:20.119 --> 00:29:21.680
for two hours every day.

550
00:29:22.319 --> 00:29:24.720
And that was how I chose.

551
00:29:24.359 --> 00:29:26.960
To say, what are the things I can control to

552
00:29:27.039 --> 00:29:28.319
make this more palatable?

553
00:29:28.759 --> 00:29:31.559
Well, and as you start to work with individuals, I

554
00:29:31.599 --> 00:29:33.079
know you're going to come up with this if you

555
00:29:33.119 --> 00:29:38.759
haven't already, is you watch this behavior and it doesn't

556
00:29:38.839 --> 00:29:42.400
make sense. It just doesn't make sense. It's not even

557
00:29:42.440 --> 00:29:44.440
something they want to do, but it seems like it's

558
00:29:44.920 --> 00:29:49.480
habitual mindset that they continue to do. And how often

559
00:29:49.519 --> 00:29:54.200
have you thought and going into what are those subconscious

560
00:29:54.640 --> 00:30:00.759
imprints that are causing the response? You know, talk about divorce,

561
00:30:00.799 --> 00:30:05.039
we talk about relationships. As I was doing some certifications

562
00:30:05.519 --> 00:30:09.279
in coaching, one of the things that came up and

563
00:30:09.720 --> 00:30:12.000
I always laugh about it because the fellows said, you know,

564
00:30:12.200 --> 00:30:14.839
this is something if you're in a relationship and things

565
00:30:14.839 --> 00:30:18.480
are struggling. He says, never do this, but this is

566
00:30:18.519 --> 00:30:23.799
what you should do. When your partner starts to get upset.

567
00:30:24.279 --> 00:30:26.839
What you need to do is sit back and say, honey,

568
00:30:27.319 --> 00:30:30.880
what emotion just came up that you responded to and

569
00:30:31.519 --> 00:30:35.680
helping them to understand that an event has no emotions

570
00:30:35.960 --> 00:30:39.680
tied to it. We apply an emotion, and oftentimes that

571
00:30:39.799 --> 00:30:44.079
emotion we apply is based on those subconscious beliefs, of

572
00:30:44.200 --> 00:30:48.759
subconscious imprints that oftentimes we had no control over that

573
00:30:49.200 --> 00:30:52.720
caused us to respond in an interesting way. I mean,

574
00:30:52.759 --> 00:30:54.200
we look at what's going on right now in the

575
00:30:54.319 --> 00:30:58.359
United States, the anger that exists, all of that is

576
00:30:58.680 --> 00:31:03.000
on both sides, and it's interesting to me to see

577
00:31:03.000 --> 00:31:07.559
how people react and I think to myself, you know what,

578
00:31:08.680 --> 00:31:12.799
here's the surface reaction going on, but what's internally going

579
00:31:12.839 --> 00:31:16.359
on to cause someone to respond that way? And I

580
00:31:16.400 --> 00:31:19.240
think that that really gets into that whole concept of

581
00:31:19.359 --> 00:31:23.200
reflecting and responsibility that you talk about, is being able

582
00:31:23.240 --> 00:31:27.960
to recognize what's happening there and then you get into

583
00:31:28.039 --> 00:31:31.599
the oh where you're starting to overcome some of those obstacles.

584
00:31:31.640 --> 00:31:33.839
And I really think you know, as we know, ninety

585
00:31:33.839 --> 00:31:37.359
percent of our brain is subconscious.

586
00:31:36.839 --> 00:31:40.039
Right what drives our behaviors is really ninety percent subconscious,

587
00:31:40.119 --> 00:31:45.039
and so it's about you know, I always know when

588
00:31:45.039 --> 00:31:48.240
I'm coaching someone and I just get this this intuitive

589
00:31:48.240 --> 00:31:51.200
feeling that it's time to ask a deep question like that,

590
00:31:51.759 --> 00:31:56.480
and you know when you've stumbled on some subconscious hardwiring

591
00:31:56.519 --> 00:31:59.920
that's in there. I remember coaching a key was in

592
00:32:00.000 --> 00:32:05.519
a world renowned cardiac surgeon and he was just known to.

593
00:32:05.559 --> 00:32:07.160
Be a bear to work with.

594
00:32:07.599 --> 00:32:10.920
I mean, it got to the point where people were quitting.

595
00:32:11.319 --> 00:32:15.200
He couldn't keep nurses, the operating room could not get staffed.

596
00:32:15.759 --> 00:32:18.519
His reputation preceded him. They were having a hard time

597
00:32:18.599 --> 00:32:23.079
recruiting people. And I coached him for a while and

598
00:32:23.119 --> 00:32:26.680
then one day I finally said to him, tell me

599
00:32:26.720 --> 00:32:29.960
about your childhood. And I build enough trust with him

600
00:32:30.000 --> 00:32:33.039
that he would. And he shared with me how as

601
00:32:33.079 --> 00:32:37.160
a young little boy he had to escape a war

602
00:32:37.240 --> 00:32:41.640
torn country for his life, and so for him, his

603
00:32:41.880 --> 00:32:46.119
conditioning is that life is a battleground, life is a

604
00:32:46.160 --> 00:32:49.480
war and he showed up every day like a warrior,

605
00:32:50.079 --> 00:32:55.559
and Wow, we had the most incredible conversation. And sometimes

606
00:32:55.599 --> 00:32:58.000
those are the moments and you just see the emotion

607
00:32:58.160 --> 00:33:01.559
in people after e'bask a cer in question that you

608
00:33:01.640 --> 00:33:03.279
know they're about to have a breakthrough.

609
00:33:03.880 --> 00:33:06.400
And it had me look at him differently too.

610
00:33:06.519 --> 00:33:09.759
It had me appreciate why he shows up the way

611
00:33:09.759 --> 00:33:13.039
he does based on his early life conditioning and his

612
00:33:13.119 --> 00:33:14.400
subconscious beliefs.

613
00:33:14.720 --> 00:33:16.240
So we got to unpack those.

614
00:33:16.519 --> 00:33:19.680
He's still there, he has managed to you his I

615
00:33:19.720 --> 00:33:21.720
think his head was on the chopping block at the time,

616
00:33:22.359 --> 00:33:24.519
but he is still there. And it's very funny. He

617
00:33:24.559 --> 00:33:26.519
said to me in our very last session, and this

618
00:33:26.640 --> 00:33:28.799
was long before I even thought about writing a book.

619
00:33:29.119 --> 00:33:31.759
He looked at me and said, so, Brenda, do you

620
00:33:31.759 --> 00:33:33.079
think you're writing a book someday?

621
00:33:33.559 --> 00:33:35.200
And I was like, I don't know where that is

622
00:33:35.240 --> 00:33:37.640
coming from. I said, I don't know why. He goes,

623
00:33:37.680 --> 00:33:40.680
do you think I'll be in it? We need to

624
00:33:40.720 --> 00:33:42.079
get your ego under control.

625
00:33:42.880 --> 00:33:45.880
Yeah, And I love that. And you know what, for

626
00:33:45.960 --> 00:33:49.559
people to understand that, that's what it means to overcome obstacles,

627
00:33:50.039 --> 00:33:54.160
they are their greatest obstacle. They's subconsciousness their greatest obstacle.

628
00:33:54.240 --> 00:33:56.960
And so I love that they freak out, that they

629
00:33:57.039 --> 00:34:00.960
start to reflect then and be responsible for that and

630
00:34:01.000 --> 00:34:04.319
then start to overcome those and that moves us into

631
00:34:04.400 --> 00:34:06.799
the next one, which is the G. And then what

632
00:34:06.920 --> 00:34:09.400
occurs as they're doing that process.

633
00:34:09.320 --> 00:34:13.159
It's g. I think I'm growing and now. And this

634
00:34:13.199 --> 00:34:16.480
is in the smallest of ways, you know. It was.

635
00:34:16.880 --> 00:34:19.599
I was talking to my mother yesterday about a friend

636
00:34:19.639 --> 00:34:22.800
of hers who just lost her husband back in November,

637
00:34:23.360 --> 00:34:27.639
and my mom said, oh, Mary's really showing some signs

638
00:34:27.639 --> 00:34:31.960
of growth. She's practicing going out to eat by herself.

639
00:34:32.360 --> 00:34:35.039
She's never had to do that before. She's always had

640
00:34:35.039 --> 00:34:39.360
her partner. And you know, some people go, what's the

641
00:34:39.360 --> 00:34:42.039
big deal? You know, I to do that all the time.

642
00:34:42.679 --> 00:34:45.360
But to Mary, it's a very big deal and it

643
00:34:45.400 --> 00:34:48.920
shouldn't be minimized. And I think we minimize our growth

644
00:34:49.280 --> 00:34:50.840
within ourselves sometimes we.

645
00:34:50.800 --> 00:34:52.320
Go, oh, well, that's a new big deal. You know.

646
00:34:52.400 --> 00:34:54.440
I don't know if this happens to other people.

647
00:34:54.480 --> 00:34:58.239
But the minute I wrote I remember, before I wrote

648
00:34:58.239 --> 00:35:00.360
a book, I was like, if I would meet an author,

649
00:35:00.679 --> 00:35:04.119
I would revere them, Oh my gosh, you wrote a book,

650
00:35:04.159 --> 00:35:06.039
because that is something I've always wanted to do.

651
00:35:06.559 --> 00:35:09.440
Once I wrote a book, I was like, I wrote

652
00:35:09.440 --> 00:35:11.239
a book. Anyone can write a book. It stops being

653
00:35:11.280 --> 00:35:12.000
such a big deal.

654
00:35:12.039 --> 00:35:16.400
Anymore, and we start to minimize that thing that was

655
00:35:16.519 --> 00:35:21.199
actually a very big, complicated deal. And so we have

656
00:35:21.320 --> 00:35:25.639
to not minimize our growth in any way, shape or form,

657
00:35:25.880 --> 00:35:31.199
big or small, because even without trying, we're going to grow. Now,

658
00:35:31.320 --> 00:35:35.519
if we are really intentional, we can have very big leaps.

659
00:35:35.639 --> 00:35:39.119
Going back to the frog, right, we can take and

660
00:35:39.159 --> 00:35:40.440
now what and turn.

661
00:35:40.280 --> 00:35:43.519
It into a why not. We can make that big leap.

662
00:35:44.000 --> 00:35:47.400
We can find ourselves more resilient, we can find ourselves

663
00:35:47.400 --> 00:35:51.960
better at reframing difficult situations. We can find ourselves taking

664
00:35:52.039 --> 00:35:54.880
risks we never would have taken if this thing hadn't

665
00:35:54.920 --> 00:35:58.360
happened to us. But the reason I have a spot

666
00:35:58.400 --> 00:36:02.440
in the back of the journal to record hops is

667
00:36:02.480 --> 00:36:05.920
because the hops, big progress doesn't happen in one big

668
00:36:06.000 --> 00:36:08.840
quantum leap. You know, even if you think about professional

669
00:36:08.960 --> 00:36:11.559
sports athletes, you know, we see them on the screen

670
00:36:11.679 --> 00:36:14.519
and they're the star quarterback.

671
00:36:13.960 --> 00:36:18.039
For an NFL team. Guess what, there were so many

672
00:36:18.199 --> 00:36:18.719
things that.

673
00:36:18.679 --> 00:36:21.840
Had to happen along the way, and every one of

674
00:36:21.880 --> 00:36:26.840
those counted. So if we count our hops and record them,

675
00:36:27.360 --> 00:36:31.599
then we actually notice our progress. And I like the

676
00:36:31.719 --> 00:36:35.039
idea that a hop is only one letter away from

677
00:36:35.199 --> 00:36:39.039
hope because it's in the hops that hope shows up

678
00:36:39.400 --> 00:36:41.920
that we're going somewhere good well.

679
00:36:42.039 --> 00:36:44.440
And I love that and the fact that you know,

680
00:36:44.480 --> 00:36:47.800
the continual hops and the realization that you know, sometimes

681
00:36:48.079 --> 00:36:50.119
we're going to hop to the side which may not

682
00:36:50.199 --> 00:36:52.320
be where we wanted to be, but you know, we

683
00:36:52.400 --> 00:36:54.559
have to because there's this obstacle in front of us.

684
00:36:54.920 --> 00:36:59.199
They're recognizing on that growing part that it is a process,

685
00:36:59.800 --> 00:37:02.360
is something that we have to have patience for and

686
00:37:02.440 --> 00:37:06.360
trusting that we can actually accomplish. And when we do

687
00:37:06.440 --> 00:37:09.239
that and focus on that and overcome, and sometimes you

688
00:37:09.239 --> 00:37:12.639
will repeat, but that overcome and overcome, and all of

689
00:37:12.679 --> 00:37:15.599
a sudden, we start to really see that growth. I

690
00:37:15.679 --> 00:37:16.039
love that.

691
00:37:16.559 --> 00:37:19.400
I saw this diagram on social media, so I'm totally

692
00:37:19.480 --> 00:37:24.679
blatantly stealing it, and it showed this diagram of something happening,

693
00:37:24.880 --> 00:37:29.559
and this little word caption comes up that says, oh,

694
00:37:29.719 --> 00:37:31.480
I can't do that, Oh.

695
00:37:31.320 --> 00:37:32.000
Maybe I can.

696
00:37:32.599 --> 00:37:35.280
Oh I can't do that, Well maybe I can, and

697
00:37:35.400 --> 00:37:38.199
I did, Oh maybe I can do that, Oh I can,

698
00:37:38.400 --> 00:37:41.199
and I did. I Mean, we start out going I

699
00:37:41.199 --> 00:37:43.039
don't know if I can do that, and then we

700
00:37:43.079 --> 00:37:46.159
get to the point where after time of doing something

701
00:37:46.360 --> 00:37:49.880
and proving ourselves again and again. When that thing shows

702
00:37:49.960 --> 00:37:52.360
up next, we go I got this, I got this.

703
00:37:53.079 --> 00:37:55.480
But it's only because we've had that series of small

704
00:37:55.519 --> 00:37:57.840
successes and we build our confidence.

705
00:37:58.079 --> 00:38:00.800
Yes, and once we've been able to do that over time,

706
00:38:01.239 --> 00:38:03.480
then comes in the S. And what is the S?

707
00:38:04.159 --> 00:38:07.079
Oh, my divorce attorney would be so proud of the

708
00:38:07.199 --> 00:38:09.960
S stage because the S is not waiting for someone

709
00:38:09.960 --> 00:38:13.039
else to make it better for you. It's not the

710
00:38:13.119 --> 00:38:16.679
prince or the princess who saved the day and brought

711
00:38:16.719 --> 00:38:22.559
you the crown. It's you crowning a more sovereign, expanded,

712
00:38:23.119 --> 00:38:26.840
stronger royal version of yourself.

713
00:38:27.239 --> 00:38:30.679
It's where you say I did that.

714
00:38:31.280 --> 00:38:34.079
I don't know how I did that. I wouldn't want

715
00:38:34.119 --> 00:38:37.039
to do it again, but I did it. And the

716
00:38:37.119 --> 00:38:40.719
beauty when we get to that space is it's from

717
00:38:40.880 --> 00:38:46.239
that space that we can share our stories with people

718
00:38:46.280 --> 00:38:50.679
going through similar situations and we serve from that space.

719
00:38:51.320 --> 00:38:54.079
I very much think the way I work with people

720
00:38:54.159 --> 00:38:57.079
today has so much to do with what I went through.

721
00:38:57.679 --> 00:39:01.599
I've even had people will hire me because of some

722
00:39:01.760 --> 00:39:05.000
of my life experiences because they go, you're going to

723
00:39:05.119 --> 00:39:05.880
understand me.

724
00:39:06.480 --> 00:39:08.800
You're going to get it. You won't judge me.

725
00:39:09.280 --> 00:39:12.360
You've been through something similar, and so this thing that

726
00:39:12.440 --> 00:39:16.199
felt so awful has actually become, in some cases, the

727
00:39:16.360 --> 00:39:20.840
very thing that creates trust and authenticity between me and

728
00:39:20.880 --> 00:39:22.159
the person I'm working with.

729
00:39:22.920 --> 00:39:28.719
And ultimately we crown our our more resilient version of.

730
00:39:28.679 --> 00:39:32.000
Ourselves well, and then we pay it forward. And it's

731
00:39:32.079 --> 00:39:35.119
so interesting, isn't it. I mean, is as I have

732
00:39:35.159 --> 00:39:38.360
interviewed so many people, it's fascinating to me how they've

733
00:39:38.360 --> 00:39:42.599
gone through these difficult times such as you did, and

734
00:39:42.719 --> 00:39:45.840
yet ultimately when they come out, then there's that sense

735
00:39:46.400 --> 00:39:48.800
of I want to serve others. I want to be

736
00:39:48.920 --> 00:39:52.320
able to help others and help lift their lives up

737
00:39:52.400 --> 00:39:57.199
and not ultimately be trodden down by the experiences, but

738
00:39:57.320 --> 00:40:01.400
being able to understand that they can transform for those experiences

739
00:40:01.800 --> 00:40:04.519
and become as you say, a stronger and as you

740
00:40:04.559 --> 00:40:07.400
put it, and you didn't say the words, but sovereign self,

741
00:40:08.119 --> 00:40:11.920
someone who literally now is in control of their lives. Yeah.

742
00:40:11.960 --> 00:40:14.239
And I mean I've had to talk to my self

743
00:40:14.280 --> 00:40:19.199
talk on occasion too, because I started speaking on the topic,

744
00:40:19.440 --> 00:40:22.440
and there have been times when I've said to myself,

745
00:40:22.679 --> 00:40:24.920
you know who wants to hire me.

746
00:40:25.039 --> 00:40:30.159
I mean, my story it's pretty vanilla. It's a divorce.

747
00:40:30.519 --> 00:40:31.440
In today's world.

748
00:40:31.519 --> 00:40:34.760
Sadly people say, yeah, I have no big deal. It's

749
00:40:34.760 --> 00:40:37.760
a divorce. Most of us you know what that's about.

750
00:40:37.920 --> 00:40:41.400
It's not like I've scaled a mountain. I haven't lost

751
00:40:41.440 --> 00:40:43.800
a limb, I haven't survived a shipwreck.

752
00:40:44.079 --> 00:40:48.119
I'm not a celebrity. Who would want to hear my story?

753
00:40:48.559 --> 00:40:53.039
That's really simple story of resilience.

754
00:40:53.639 --> 00:40:56.360
And then I really had to have a talk and

755
00:40:56.400 --> 00:40:59.440
to with myself to say, well, Brenda, let's get real.

756
00:41:00.039 --> 00:41:03.400
If you're staring out at an audience of listeners, how

757
00:41:03.440 --> 00:41:05.719
many of them can relate to scaling a mountain, being

758
00:41:05.719 --> 00:41:07.519
a celebrity, losing a limb?

759
00:41:08.480 --> 00:41:09.039
Very few?

760
00:41:09.480 --> 00:41:11.840
But I've at at least fifty percent of those folks

761
00:41:12.360 --> 00:41:14.559
have known what it's like to go through a big

762
00:41:14.599 --> 00:41:15.880
life transition.

763
00:41:15.480 --> 00:41:16.079
Or a divorce.

764
00:41:16.679 --> 00:41:20.360
And so I had to reframe for myself. This isn't

765
00:41:20.360 --> 00:41:23.159
a boring, vanilla story. This is a story that more

766
00:41:23.199 --> 00:41:26.119
people can even relate to. So we have to watch

767
00:41:26.159 --> 00:41:28.480
what our self talk says to us, because it is

768
00:41:28.559 --> 00:41:31.679
so quick to minimize us and say, well, that thing

769
00:41:31.719 --> 00:41:34.400
I went through wasn't a big deal compared to what

770
00:41:34.440 --> 00:41:37.719
other people go through, And so you know, we have

771
00:41:37.760 --> 00:41:40.800
to be mindful of this thing called comparative grief where

772
00:41:40.840 --> 00:41:43.159
we say, well, what I'm going through is nothing compared

773
00:41:43.199 --> 00:41:45.280
to what the people in the Ukraine are going for

774
00:41:45.679 --> 00:41:49.599
going through, which is true, and I can have grief

775
00:41:50.000 --> 00:41:54.920
and pray for them and not minimize whatever is going

776
00:41:54.960 --> 00:41:57.800
on in my life that is relative to my life.

777
00:41:58.400 --> 00:42:02.039
Well, and as you say, I think so well, is

778
00:42:02.239 --> 00:42:05.199
that you never know that one person. And you know,

779
00:42:05.280 --> 00:42:08.639
I've really focused on the one in my life now

780
00:42:08.679 --> 00:42:10.519
because originally it's like, all right, how am I going

781
00:42:10.599 --> 00:42:12.480
to help all of these people? And all of a

782
00:42:12.519 --> 00:42:14.599
sudden it's like, you know what. It goes back to

783
00:42:14.639 --> 00:42:17.400
the story of the little boy during the shellfish, you know,

784
00:42:17.679 --> 00:42:20.840
out the surfish out in the ocean, and you know,

785
00:42:20.920 --> 00:42:23.239
the man saying what are you doing? He says, You're

786
00:42:23.280 --> 00:42:25.199
not going to make a difference. He goes, I just

787
00:42:25.199 --> 00:42:28.039
did for that one. And I think that's so important

788
00:42:28.039 --> 00:42:30.039
for people to understand that as they go through this

789
00:42:30.119 --> 00:42:33.239
process of frogs, and I love that as they go

790
00:42:33.280 --> 00:42:38.000
through that process, they will find themselves sertain typically reaching

791
00:42:38.239 --> 00:42:41.039
the one there will be one person out there that

792
00:42:41.079 --> 00:42:44.079
they will be able to touch, and as that happens,

793
00:42:44.199 --> 00:42:48.079
it will make the difference of that individual's life. And

794
00:42:48.199 --> 00:42:50.840
so you know, as I hear what you've been doing

795
00:42:50.880 --> 00:42:54.920
and so forth, I just honor you for what you've

796
00:42:54.920 --> 00:42:58.760
done and what you are doing because it makes a difference.

797
00:42:58.960 --> 00:43:01.559
And I think that's so important. He guess what our.

798
00:43:01.400 --> 00:43:02.000
Time is up?

799
00:43:05.480 --> 00:43:07.480
So so what I'd love for you to do, though,

800
00:43:07.559 --> 00:43:09.880
is share with the audience just kind of a final message.

801
00:43:09.920 --> 00:43:12.480
What would be that message that you'd like to share

802
00:43:12.519 --> 00:43:12.840
with them?

803
00:43:13.480 --> 00:43:19.519
My message is that behind every now what is a

804
00:43:19.599 --> 00:43:20.039
why not?

805
00:43:20.760 --> 00:43:21.440
Like why not?

806
00:43:22.119 --> 00:43:25.559
Ready to be unleashed. So when the now what shows up?

807
00:43:26.079 --> 00:43:28.800
Say to yourself, what could this make possible?

808
00:43:29.320 --> 00:43:29.599
Oh?

809
00:43:29.679 --> 00:43:31.239
I love it? I love it? And how do people

810
00:43:31.239 --> 00:43:34.079
find you? Share with you their website and how can

811
00:43:34.119 --> 00:43:35.599
they find your book?

812
00:43:36.000 --> 00:43:39.440
They can find both books on Amazon, that's easy, or

813
00:43:39.480 --> 00:43:43.480
through my website which is Brenda at Brenda the letter

814
00:43:43.559 --> 00:43:46.159
k Reynolds R E Y N O L d s

815
00:43:46.320 --> 00:43:47.119
dot com.

816
00:43:47.280 --> 00:43:48.480
Easiest way to find me.

817
00:43:49.039 --> 00:43:52.320
And like you, you know, whether you're a group, an

818
00:43:52.440 --> 00:43:56.400
organization or that one little individual starfish.

819
00:43:56.000 --> 00:44:00.199
I like working with the starfish too. And get Ben.

820
00:44:00.280 --> 00:44:05.039
Wonderful, wonderful Brenda, thank you so much. This has been

821
00:44:05.239 --> 00:44:07.320
just a wonderful conversation.

822
00:44:07.960 --> 00:44:10.440
It was, it really was. We could do around two

823
00:44:10.519 --> 00:44:12.840
and three, you know, so I absolutely.

824
00:44:12.519 --> 00:44:15.159
Hate you go ahead and book yourself again.

825
00:44:15.159 --> 00:44:18.280
I would love it jeezing, But thank you so much.

826
00:44:18.440 --> 00:44:19.679
I enjoyed every minute.

827
00:44:19.760 --> 00:44:22.320
All right, and folks, thanks for listening. I hope you've

828
00:44:22.320 --> 00:44:24.480
really enjoyed this and you'll take some things to heart.

829
00:44:24.519 --> 00:44:27.320
And definitely I've got that book and I tell you

830
00:44:27.400 --> 00:44:31.320
it's just fascinating. It's worth looking at. So anyway, thanks

831
00:44:31.360 --> 00:44:33.400
for listening. I hope you join us again soon. This

832
00:44:33.480 --> 00:44:35.840
is doctor Doug saying no mistay