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I have spent years in conversation with people who are
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successful by every measure and still quietly restless, not broken,
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not lost, just aware somewhere underneath the noise that there
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is a version of their life that feels more honest,
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more grounded, more genuinely theirs. This podcast exists for those people,
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for the ones who are done performing and ready to
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go deeper. My name is Dr. Doug. Welcome to Inspire Vision.
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I am glad you are here. Chip, welcome back to
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the show.
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Dr. Doug, it is so great to be here. I
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can't believe you've asked me back. I know. We had
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such a good conversation the first time.
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It was such a great conversation, and we didn't even
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get to half of the stuff that I felt like
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would be such value for the audience to hear about,
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you know, from the standpoint of your wisdom and your experience. So,
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Real briefly, give the audience again, for those that may
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not have heard the first one, a little bit about yourself.
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Author, speaker, craftsman, and I'm just, that's about it. I'm
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doing a lot of writing. I'm in the middle of,
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in fact, I just finished a chapter on the new
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book that's coming out next year. But I'm just, I'm
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having a ball. Executive coach and a lot of other things.
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Well, and as you talk about executive coach, is that
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personal development challenges or is it more of a business related?
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Yes, I'm an executive coach, so I'm not a life coach.
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Every time I hear life coach, I kind of get
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the shivers because it drives me a little bit nuts.
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But no, I deal with business issues, personnel, strategy, that
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kind of stuff. So yes. I laugh at that.
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You know, I actually, you know, when I moved to
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Utah years ago and started working on working with people
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and so forth based on behavioral analyses and so forth,
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everybody in the networking groups were life coaches. And it's
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like if they lost a job, they became a life coach.
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And I thought to myself, oh, my goodness. So I
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appreciate what you're talking about there.
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You will never find me going on a date with anybody.
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Have you heard that about life coaches? They tend to
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go on dates with people. I think there's been about
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at least 25 or 30 TV shows that have a
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life coach in them and it's somebody that's lost a
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job or somebody that can't find meaningful employment anywhere else
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and they call themselves life coaches. So we've just pissed
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off all the life coaches that are listening to us.
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We have and Our apologies, but hey, that's the reality
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of it. And there we go. So your next book,
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what's the name of the next book that's coming out?
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It's called Handoffs. And it's a fictional story. It's first
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time I've written fiction, first time I've had to write dialogue,
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which was a real trip. But it is about a
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family logistics business, because I know a lot about family
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logistics businesses. And I'm The 82-year-old guy who runs it
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is not willing to let go. The 54-year-old son really
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wants to take over, and the old man won't let him.
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It is so much like just about all of the
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businesses that I deal with. In fact, I sent it
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to a bunch of people to get endorsements for the book,
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and just about everybody came back with, did you write
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that about my family? You know, so I love it. Yeah,
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I know it was a ringing a little bit too
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close to the truth. But I use the five C's
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framework in that to to get the family out of
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the crisis they're in.
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OK, and let's let's get into that. You know, there's
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a couple of things that since our first chat I've seen,
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you know, we became friends on Facebook. I see that you,
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you know, have an incredible talent and. Here's what's interesting
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to me. I think about it all of the time.
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So often things have been taught in parables. You know,
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Christ taught in parables. And so often I don't think
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we realize that there are so many things in our
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lives that occur or that we do that if we
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sit back and really develop that sense of curiosity about it,
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that we can realize that there's a life parable in that.
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And I appreciate the fact that, you know, you have
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talked a little bit about that. But tell the audience
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a little bit about why you're a craftsman. What is
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it that you do? And then let's talk a little
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bit about the parable that comes from that or the parables.
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That's a great question. You know, one of the things
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that I don't consider myself a craftsman or did not
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consider myself a craftsman. for a long time. I think
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we talked a little bit about the stroke the first
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time we talked. Coming out of the stroke, my wife
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bought me a lathe and it transformed everything. It opened
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up all kinds of neural pathways that I didn't know existed.
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It might have been the body movements or it might
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have been getting out of the way of a 30-pound
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chunk of spinning wood. It taught me so much, and
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it's taught me so much about craft. It's taught me
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so much about life. Because wood is an organic object,
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and it never stops moving, just like relationships never stop moving.
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We can be great friends one day, and then something happens,
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and we're not, or something happens, and we're even greater friends.
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So the wood never stops moving. The people never stop moving.
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That's one thing we know about finished pieces. In fact,
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I had a platter that I gave to a friend
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of mine in Florida. And going from the less humidity
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in North Carolina to Florida, which has a lot of humidity,
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all of a sudden the thing started warping. And I
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never could have, yeah, I never could have seen that coming. But, uh, um,
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you know, he called, he said, is the, is the
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platter supposed to be round? And I said, no, it's not,
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but thank you for letting me know. And I'll go
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ahead and send you another one if you, if you
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would like, because you know, it, it doesn't stop moving. Um,
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the other thing is, uh, um, craftsmanship. So there was a, uh,
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a chapter in, um, Every Dog Has Its Day that
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came out in March that talks about hollow forms. And
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I don't know if you've ever heard of a hollow form,
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but a hollow form is like a vase or could be,
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I think there's one of them, that thing that's sitting
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behind me on the shelf back there is a hollow form.
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And in a hollow form, it has usually a small
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hole in the top and then is hollowed out on
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the inside. And it's done with a tool. And you
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can't see what you're doing. You know, you can feel.
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You can feel by the way the tool bites. Or
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you can feel, you know, you turn off the lathe
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and you feel inside. But you can't feel it otherwise.
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And for the most part, it's hidden. So, you know,
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nobody's really going to see it. Or nobody's really going
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to feel it. I mean, it's just, you know, it's
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kind of like the inside of an iPhone. You know?
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Nobody's ever going to be in the inside of an iPhone,
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but Steve Jobs wanted to make it beautiful. And the
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story in Every Dog Has His Day is about my wife.
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I've been married almost 42 years. We've had our ups
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and downs, as every married couple does. And our marriage
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is a lot like... a hollow form, you know, because
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nobody sees the work that it takes. Nobody sees what
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it's like to be inside it. Everybody sees the public
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persona or the, you know, the one going out with
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friends or that kind of stuff. And so, you know,
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it's just being a craftsman means you care about what
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it looks like on the inside.
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Well, and as you talk about that, I think so often,
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We really don't know what's going on within a person's soul,
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within their heart, what's going on in their mind. And
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we see certain behavior, and we can either choose to
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react to that behavior or, as you say, just start
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to feel it. And the way that we do that, obviously,
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is in a conversation, in a communication, what's going on,
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tell me a little bit about what's happening. And as
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we seek to be transparent with ourselves and seek to
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have those that are important to us become transparent, I
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think that conversation all of a sudden comes out to, well,
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I'm starting to feel this, or this is what's happening
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to me, or here's the emotion that just came up
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because of this event, or maybe because of something you said.
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And and i love i love the concept the parable
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of that that sometimes we can't see it but we
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can feel it and if we get in and dive
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in a little bit more we start to get a
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sense of what's really going on so I think that
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is such a cool parable that you just shared.
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Well, do you consider the podcast a craft of yours?
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You know, I do.
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It's interesting. One of the thoughts that just came to
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my mind as you were talking is here you are,
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an executive mentor, an executive coach, whatever you want to
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call it, and you've been doing this for years. And
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you have the stroke, you come out, and your wife
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obviously is inspired to give you a gift that somehow
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she knows is going to become so valuable for you.
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And I think about the fact that, and as I've
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done my own personality, my personal portrait on myself and others,
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And I recognized as I went through my own that,
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you know, being a dentist really fulfilled a very specific
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aspect of who I was. I'm very left-brained. I'm very both,
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you know, up and down. So I'm very much focused
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on a very specific thing. And my dentistry gave me
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the ability to really focus on small little details and
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do all of that. And so that was That was
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really great. And then, you know, as I shared with you,
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all of a sudden, I can't do that anymore. And
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for a few years, I'm trying to figure out this.
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I become, you know, I go back to business school
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and I'm working with small businesses and so forth and
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doing okay, but not feeling totally comfortable anymore. And all
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of a sudden the podcast opportunity comes up and I
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start doing that and I'm enjoying that, you know, and
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it really was business tips and trends. So I'm still
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doing the business stuff. And I may have shared this
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with you, but my dad passed away at 93, 92, 93.
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And we went back to Chicago. He had a memorial
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service done by the university students that had been his,
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that were then professors in music. And it was fascinating
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to me to walk away from that and realize that
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the message that we got from his students was so fascinating.
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Incredible singers, classical voice singers, some renowned, and their message
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was simple. Norman was an incredible voice teacher, and they
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told funny stories about how he'd come to their operas
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and he'd sit in the corner and kind of raise
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his hand and do little things to try to give
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them a little guidance as they're singing. But their main
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message was, yeah, he was a great voice teacher, but
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he gave us the strength and power to win, to succeed,
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to live, and to love. And that moment, I walked
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out of there and, you know, my family, my brothers,
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my little sister, they all had different views about my
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dad and so forth. But I walked out of there thinking,
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you know what? what a legacy for him to leave.
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And was it necessarily with his own kids? To some degree, yes.
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But more importantly, with all of those students of his,
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what a legacy. And I came back and I thought,
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you know what? I need to change the direction. What
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is it that I want to do? And that's when
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I changed my podcast concept from business tips and trends
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to inspire vision, making a difference in people's lives. And
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for you, you know, here you are coming out of
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your medical situation and your wife gives you a gift.
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But what you find out is that has become such
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a fulfilling role for you. And I look at that
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and as I went back and looked at my, you know,
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my personal portrait, I realized that there was a whole
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other section of motivators and values that I had not
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really necessarily been fulfilling in my dentistry, although I'd been
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doing some other things. But all of a sudden, this
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is what started to really feel real and so important
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in my life. And so now it is so fulfilling.
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And I look at that with you. Here you are
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doing all the things you've done that are successful and
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so forth. All of a sudden, you have this lathe
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and you have become a craftsman. in making these beautiful
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pieces that you make. And I think, you know, there's
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another example of something that had lied dormant for a while,
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but life circumstances came about to where all of a
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sudden you found something else that was extremely fulfilling and
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met some of those deep values and motivators that perhaps
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you hadn't experienced for a while. Yeah, yeah.
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You know, my mother-in-law had a lot to do with
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it as well. She was 12 days shy of 98
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when she passed. She passed in my easy chair in
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my wife's arms. It was pretty incredible. But she lived
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with us for the last few years. And she saw
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the transformation with a lathe. She was my worst critic
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and my best critic ever. Uh, because I, I would always,
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you know, I'd finish up a piece and I'd bring
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it upstairs and, and, uh, and walk in and hand
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it to her and she would look at it over and,
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you know, feel it. And, um, she was an incredible